Someone in our gubmint bought a printer.
The cost was €800, which seems a bit steep considering PCWorld are offering printers for under €25?
The cost was €800,000. An easy slip of the pen when it’s someone else’s money?
So they spent €800,000 on a printer, but alas that wasn’t the end of the story.
You see, someone fucked up the measurements and it transpired that having bought the printer, they discovered that the room that was to house it wasn’t big enough. Again, a simple mistake but hey, it’s not their money so who cares? So they put the printer into storage [at a couple of grand a month] while they rebuilt the room at a cost of €236,000. That seems a bit steep as you could damn near build a whole house for that, but once more it isn’t their money.
It now transpires that while they were buying this printer they decided to get a few little accessories to go with it. There was a Plate Making Device, whatever the fuck that is [and a snip at €105,000], a Folding Machine [only €100,000], a Guillotine [€63,500] and a Pile Turner [€37,000].
All in all this printer has now cost the tax payer €1.8 million. And they haven’t even started training people to use the fucking thing which will probably force the overall cost over the €2 million mark.
Two million yoyos for a fucking printer?
Is it any wonder I do my damndest to avoid and evade paying taxes when they just piss that money against the wall?
And as we all know, buying branded ink cartridges can cost almost as much as the printer cost, so replacing them on that sucker could prove a tad expensive…
At that cost the machine should be good enough to print off bank notes. Quantitative Easing here we come…
It seems there's two things that all major governments have in common. Cost overruns (paying too much for anything), bad planning, and no foresight whatsoever.
Anyway, you should see the size of this mother. It's more a printing press than a plain old printer:
They couldn't even fit it through the original door.
(sigh) I meant there's three things that all major governments have in common, not two. Perhaps I should trade in my keyboard for a good book?
The other thing that all governments have in common is that no-one ever gets fired. If all such monumental cock-ups at the tax-payers' expense resulted in the loss of jobs and pensions for those 'responsible', then maybe they'd start working like professionals for a change.
The paper on which the legislation is printed is hand made at a museum at Wookey Hole in Somerset – I am not joking!