Giving out stink
Our Penny has a new parlour trick.
Each night as I’m going to bed I give her a couple of small biscuits. It’s part of the routine and can never be missed.
As soon as I’m in bed she jumps up on the bed, lies down and burps. Fine. My bed isn’t high society so burps are perfectly acceptable.
Lately however she has added a little twist to her routine. Now, when she burps she farts as well. I don’t know what it is about dogs but their anal emissions are particularly pungent. They’d bring a tear to your eye quicker than a sniff of ammonia.
After our little escapade on the stairs, Herself is stuck downstairs so has moved into my room. Initially she blamed me of course for the smell. I had to explain to her that the malodorous stench was in fact emanating from our Penny. So now the routine is that I go to bed, dog jumps up and Herself yells “Jeeezus your fucking dog has farted again!”. It’s funny how when Penny is cute and cuddly she’s our dog, but when she farts she’s my dog?
The only thing I can think of is her food which I changed a few weeks ago. I buy by the sack and the latest contents are little pea sized nuts, whereas previously they were larger. Penny loves either and will fill her face with a load and then deposit it on her couch where she’s eat them one by one. The problem is that the sack is only half way empty so we have got to suffer the farts for quite a while yet.
I’m not sure of the solution to the little problem. Either Herself or the dog will have to go until I switch back to the old food?.
I’ll make a bed for Herself on the couch.
Couldn’t you slip the dog food into your wife’s meals? Then she would only have herself to blame…
Are you joking me?! Herself frequently amuses the Grandkids by blowing off. Even I couldn’t compete, which is something.
Then she’s got a nerve complaining about your dog!
That’s what I said.
The bruises have nearly faded now.
Very amusing!
Not in my bedroom, it isn’t!
https://starecat.com/underwear-patch-to-make-your-farts-smell-like-mint/ i think theres a dog version
Dear Grandad
I was looking after a Gordon setter a few years back and was called upon to look after two vanilla Labradors nearby. The Gordon setter had a special diet, the Labs didn’t. Come supper time I fed all three on the Labs’ food.
The meal had a profound effect on his digestion, which elicited strong comments from my sister who happened to be passing by. Changing diet can have interesting results, works for me too.
A couple of solutions for your problem: give the rest of the bag to a friend and hope it doesn’t affect his dog(s) the same way; give it to someone you are not particularly fond of and hope it does.
Hope this helps.
DP
You miss one important fact about dog farts, the worst ones are always silent. You may see a small twitch of the nose, as the perpetrator tests the quality of the output, but if you miss this tiny gesture, you get no warning of the incoming nostril attack. They always fart when relaxing too.
Many years ago we had a small Jack Russell cross that clear a room quicker than someone running in and shouting “Allahu Akbar”! My young niece once lifted the dog into her lap and began petting it. The dog of course loved this and curled up to enjoy the attention. 30 seconds later, the poor dog was launched into the air by a screaming child after one of those stealth attacks. I don’t think my niece has liked dogs ever since. It was funny though. 😉
The SBD. Silent but Deadly. Always the worst.
Purely personal, but yet another reason to not have a dog.
There is no reason not to have a dog. Unless you live in a shoebox?
Love your dog, love the farts.
As the saying goes – her shite is chocolate.