What a lot of bull
I was living in blissful ignorance until now.
However the peace of my little world has been shattered when I learn that apparently this is World Vegan Month.
Now I’m not quite sure what this means. To me, it frankly means nothing, and I don’t care if it’s Vegan, Venezuelan, Vegetarian or Viagran Month, but I am a tad bemused by the whole concept of a month dedicated to some fucking fad..
Is this the month I am supposed to go Vegan? Is it a sort of free trial offer? I am asked if I would consider going Vegan and the answer is a loud resounding and very definite NO.
I watched Claire Byrne Live, which is a discussion programme on RTE on Monday and there was a right twat on. Need I say any more than he was from “Friends of the Earth”? According to him the entire planet is in imminent danger of collapse unless I give up eating cows. By sheer coincidence I had just had a fine meal [my own recipe and cooked by yours truly] of cow stew and it was delicious. Last night I had a salmon bake thingy and it too was delicious but presumably means I am now personally guilty of denuding the oceans and endangering the salmon species. Tonight there is shepherd’s pie on the menu which consists of a potato layer over a lovely base consisting mainly of cow. So I am indeed personally killing of the planet, and you know what? I couldn’t give flying shite.
The problem with Vegans is their smugness and virtuosity. They feel that they can somehow look down on us omnivores because we are guilty of wholesale slaughter and just think of all those cute little calves, lambs and piglets that we are massacring and then digesting. They conjure up images of half a cow lying on the dining table, oozing blood and guts while we rip and tear into the carcase like voracious wolves. They can fuck off.
What they fail to see is that if I stopped eating meat it would have absolutely zero effect on anything except myself. I enjoy my beef stews, my roast lamb and my steaks so the only person who would be affected would be my good self. Possibly the only benefit of such a move would be that I could then become the horribly smug bollix that everyone avoids. But I don’t class that as a benefit.
If someone wants to become Vegan then that’s their business, but don’t ever try and make it my business.
I love the delicious smell of frying smoked rashers too much.
What we really need to do is to reduce the world population. For example we could start by eliminating the Vegans. After all they are obviously here illegally as we have no immigration quotas for the star Vega.
I wonder what a Vegan tastes like? I would imagine the meat would be pretty stringy and tasteless.
I think you mean virtuousness, not virtuosity!
They can still fuck off either way.
Here in the UK , the Guardian has an article advocating a tax on red meat. Apparently if the price of bacon, sausages and ham were doubled it would cover the healthcare costs incurred by those products. It must be right because it’s all in a “study”.
Vegans are the new Pioneers!
I must admit that I am a part vegan. Many of the animals I eat are vegetarian. I am also a member of PETA – People Eating Tasty Animals.
If your pie is full of cow it ain’t a sheperd’s pie. It’s a Cottage pie. Go and kill a sheep.
I just love your rambles! For gods sake don’t stop.
A few years back a local restaurant, Saskatoon’s, put up a billboard on a local express way. A tranquil back lighted scene with a moose peacefully eating. In large letters were the words “There is room on Earth for all of God’s creatures”. Underneath that in only slightly smaller letters was “right next to mashed potatoes”.
The local PETA group lost their minds, assuming they had them to begin with.
For years I’ve been saying I am a firm vegetarian. But since I can’t stand the taste of grass I delegate the grass eating bit to any passing cow sheep goat camel pig duck or etc.
I’ve had more laughs than death threats but some of the offendees have been foaming mad. Strange people.
I read recently that the increasing popularity of Almond milk has prompted the wholesale planting of new orchards. This is devastating the local environment in California as they need vast quantities of water for irrigation. Also Brazil is planting vast areas of soybean and burning all the local flora to clear the land. Still, if it saves one little lamb it will be worth it.
“If someone wants to become Vegan then that’s their business”
Quite right. And some are happy to be invisible and private about their choices.
Salute them, I think;- some may be among us ;- that is, smokers as well, and so on …
Quietly going about their business without disturbing others, or being disturbed …
” but don’t ever try and make it my business.”
Again, quite right.
Proselyting is most often utterly irritating.
Anyway, although I was a vegetarian for a while in my early 20’s, and three times that now, keeping the good oils and grains & etc. but allowing myself eggs fish meat (& I very rarely buy milk, has to be full cream best, but always buy cream) and l like eating vegetables, and the processes of cooking (not up to baking yet much but inspired) now I would express sympathy, empathy too.
But this is still a very amusing video skit, at a dinner party with a vegetarian friend:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Mr-2jb6oNA
“‘it’s an ethical thing, I don’t think that humans should be treated like this”
And then there is Pet Hospital
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XnLVQylARRQ
“Oh, the humanity!”
Very enjoyable to read your blog.
Thanks!
How do you tell a vegan?
you don’t have to. They’ll tell you.
“They conjure up images of half a cow lying on the dining table, oozing blood and guts …”
Well, with me they conjure up images of cute little mice being killed by the thousands to protect their animal friendly wheat. And it’s not a nice death, these cute little mice suffer.
Watched a video earlier today of an Irish socialist former teacher turned author who has transformed her three acress from rushes and stuff into wonderful woodland.
As a good socialist she is happy to pay taxes and she was happy to apply to the Irish inland revenue for writers exemption or something, anyway she got it so she has to earn over 50,000 yoyos before she has to begin paying income tax.
A digression, sorry.
She has recently as in a few months ago gone full vegan and now follows the wfpb diet. (whole food plant based)
She has a cat which is getting over cat flu and on the little table next to cat were three bowls, one had spring water in it off her land, ordinary cat food in the second and in the third the one covered up with foil was some freshly cooked chicken, cooked and delivered by her daughter.
How’s that for commitment to the vegan cause for cause it is for all the ones who bang on about it and she does.
Got hit with a spam form. New policy, old man?
Watched a video earlier today of an Irish socialist former teacher turned author who has transformed her three acress from rushes and stuff into wonderful woodland.
As a good socialist she is happy to pay taxes and she was happy to apply to the Irish inland revenue for writers exemption or something, anyway she got it so she has to earn over 50,000 yoyos before she has to begin paying income tax.
A digression, sorry.
She has recently as in a few months ago gone full vegan and now follows the wfpb diet. (whole food plant based)
She has a cat which is getting over cat flu and on the little table next to cat were three bowls, one had spring water in it off her land, ordinary cat food in the second and in the third the one covered up with foil was some freshly cooked chicken, cooked and delivered by her daughter.
How’s that for commitment to the vegan cause for cause it is for all the ones who bang on about it and she does.
I love it when vegans try and tell me their diet is the ‘healthiest’, the most ‘natural’…and then I tell them I was a vegan until I collapsed at work with vitamin deficiency.
I recently went to a “do” where the choice of menu for the night was either Vegan or Vegetarian. Needless to say, I went for the Vegetarian option and I have to say that it was delicious. The only trouble was, once I got home after the “do” (which wasn’t that much later, incidentally – it wasn’t a very late night) I was – no kidding – absolutely starving! Rumbly tummy – the lot. As soon as I’d got my gladrags off and my slobby gear on, I had to make myself a ham sandwich to avoid going to bed ravenous. Veggie enthusiasts can say all they like about the health perils of meat but there’s no doubt at all that it keeps you fuller for a whole lot longer than veggie food does. No wonder all the vegan/vegetarians I know always look so morose and fed up – they’re always raging hungry!
Dear Grandad
All flesh is grass: Isaiah 40:6-7
So we are all vegan now.
DP
They all wear leather shoes I notice. Hypocritical bastards.
Vegans belong to a larger, frightening and growing group taking over western civilization. The ITBOY group (I am the boss of you). These people have been raised to believe they are foolproof and God’s gift to the world but eventually discover they are twits so cling to one insane cause or another in order to force their twitdom on everyone.