We are to have a presidential election here in a few months.
Our current Pres Michael D Higgins – affectionately called “The Hobbit” on account of his somewhat vertically challenged stature – has done a good job for the last few years and is quite willing to do another seven. Everyone seemed quite happy with this until some fucking eejit decided that “the People should have a choice”. Quite why we need a choice is beyond me if the current incumbent is doing a fair job, but eejits will be eejits.
So now we are encumbered with a fucking election which we need like a hole in the fucking head. What’s worse, people seem to be queueing for the job.
The candidates so far:
Bilbo Baggins Michael D Higgins.
The current Pres. Is doing an excellent job even if foreign dignitaries have to kneel for official photographs.
A baldy little fuck with dubious connections to the political crowd who bankrupt Ireland in ’08. Wouldn’t buy a second hand bike off him. He’s the first of our “Dragons’ Den” hopefuls [yes – there is more than one].
Another “Dragons’ Den” contender. A smug bastard who is probably counting on the celebrity vote. Unfortunately there are enough sheeple who could vote for him simple because he’s a “celebrity”.
Never heard of her.
Artist. Ex children’s TV presenter. If successful, would be Ireland’s first black pres. That would be interesting?
That mob haven’t made their minds up yet who to dump into the fray. Gerry Adams? Who knows? Who cares?
Pádraig Ó Céidigh
Never heard of him either.
Yet another I have never heard of. Apparently she’s a journalist, whatever that has to do with it.
Marie Goretti Moylan
Was supposed to meet with her local council to discuss nominations but apparently didn’t turn up. Doesn’t auger well for someone who is supposed to attend official functions?
A farmer who reckons he isn’t making enough money. Apparently wants the job for the pay. I’d vote for him for sheer honesty!
A lead guitarist with a band I have never heard of. What the fuck? What the hell has this country come to?
Sarah Louise Mulligan
Runs a website! irishwholovepresidenttrump.com Holy fuck! I think that says it all?
So there you have it. We now have a list of outstanding candidates.
I have a good mind to add my name to the list.