With a spring in my step — 15 Comments

  1. Old music hall riddle :

    Q.”What’s more important a wife or a pair of trousers”

    A.”A pair of trousers ,you can go anywhere without a wife ! ”

  2. Get low fat or skim milk the next time… it lasts way longer. OR trade in your postman for a milkman QED.

    • Low fat?  Skimmed milk?  You one of those Healthists?  I demand full fat with no added or subtracted shit, thanks very much.

    • It seems to be a common problem.  Mornings are a time for tip-toeing and waiting for the first holler of the day.

  3. Mrs Bucko is the same. I keep a tub of powerdered milk. Not that it does any good. It will sit there for months and then be rock solid whenever it’s actually needed.

    • That’s not too bad an idea…  I used to use the stuff if we went camping or picnicking but that was yonks ago.  I might try it again for emergencies.

    • Next time you visit a coffee shop, or stay in a hotel, grab a handful of those paper wrapped tube like single portions of powdered milk (and coffee and ketchup, mustard and stuff). Keeps for yonks – and longer still if you stick them in a tightly wrapped poly bag at the back of the freezer.  

  4. Get in some UHT stuff.  It’ll sit in the cupboard for months, until a time such as this.  It’s what I do, ‘cos I am very forgetful these days and quite uncoordinated.  Wish I could buy a lot of other food stuffs in UHT format!



    • That’s the stuff they have in France.  I never took to the stuff [even though it does last for ages].  And if I’m not fond of it you can imagine what Herself is like?

  5. Tell Herself that tea is a modern innovation and that you should drink mead or ale in the mornings!

  6. Ha!

    Germans have a very precise (of course) word for my feelings reading this post; “Schadenfreude”. Dunno what the English equivalent word for it is…oh that’s right-there isn’t one. Lazy gits and emotional spastic parrots that we are we couldn’t be arsed coming up with a compound noun of our own to describe “pleasure derived by someone from another person’s misfortune” so we just nicked the German, plus ça change.

    Anyways the reason for my “pleasure derived from another’s misfortune” is that The Bestes Frau In The World jacks up on strong anti-psychotics and anti-depressants every night and they-besides keeping her out of The Secure Unit, causing her to have a BMI equivalent to her age and losing all her hair- mean she sleeps 15 hours solid each night. I say ‘sleep’ but I doubt even  Hieronymus Bosch  on ergot had dreams like hers. The Kraken waketh not before the crack of noon, by which time I have of course ensured there is everything to hand she requires to greet the new morning , ok then, the new afternoon.

    I knew there had to be an upside to Haloperidol. Thank you Janssen Pharmaceutica. Best thing to come out of Belgium since Fries and Tin Tin.

    Sucks to be yous guys 😛

    ps. from The Bestes Frau In The World’s recent ‘PIP’ (google it) interrogation:

    Q.”Does she cook? Can she cook a meal?”

    A.”What bit of ‘Paranoid Psychotic’ do you not understand? The bit about not letting her have access to sharp knives?”

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