I came across an interesting article the other day.
The first thing I learned from it is that 6 trillion cigarette butts are discarded every year. I presume they sent out some poor sod to count them all, which must have been a tedious job?
The second thing I learned is that those 6 trillion butts weigh 1.2 trillion tons. Now my maths is getting a little rusty, but by my calculations, that means that each butt weighs in at 0.2 tons, which in turn means that a pack of twenty weighs four tons, and that's not even counting the packaging or the unburnt part of the cigarettes? It's no wonder they call them heavy smokers?
The gist of the article though was that some bright spark in Australia has discovered a use for all these butts. He turns 'em into bricks! Not only that, but the bricks he makes are cheaper to produce, lighter and better insulators. It sounds to me like he's onto a winner here?
So everybody should be happy. The environment wins because there won't be any butts lying around any more and also less fuel is used firing the bricks. Not only will the bricks be cheaper to use, making housing cheaper, but we will end up with better insulation in our homes which is also environmentally friendly. The only problem is that the world's population will have to go into cigarette butt production overdrive, so those fuckwits in Tobacco Control will have to be disbanded, or burned at the stake or something, because they are being singularly environmentally unfriendly.
Of course there is one drawback to this little idea – those morons who actually believe in the myth of third hand smoke will have nowhere to live. Their very homes would be slowly and inexorably killing them as the deadly toxins will be seeping out of their walls and strangling them as they sleep.
Of course this could be considered as a bonus.
Anyone who actually believes in such ludicrous notions would be quietly culled by their own homes, thereby improving the overall intelligence level of mankind.
You can't argue with Darwin?