Don't you just love science?
I'm talking about real science and not those who macerate numbers to prove their preconceived notions. The latter just give science a bad name.
The lads over at CERN are at it again, playing with their favourite toy, the Large Hadron Collider [V 2.0].
Their latest venture is to find Dark Matter. Now Dark Matter makes up 80% of everything so you'd think you'd be tripping over the stuff at every move. I have had a good search for it around the house, the garden and even under the beds and have drawn a complete blank which is strange if 80% of where I searched is made of this stuff?
But science is a tricky bugger. I thought if I switched on all the lights then something dark would be easy to spot, but the scientists are one step ahead of me. They claim that it's invisible [are we back to Harvey again?] and undetectable.
I think this is a bit of a cop out. They tell us something is there, and when we can see it they immediately say that it's not only invisible but undetectable as well. That's cheating. If I went to pay for my baccy with Dark Money would the shopkeeper be happy? Even if I explained to him that the money is there all right, but he can't see it and it's undetectable anyway, then I doubt very much if I would get away with it? But apparently the scientists can and fair play to them. It's a great trick.
So having invented something that isn't there [if you can’t see it, measure it or even detect it then to all intents and purposes it isn’t there?] they are now setting out to detect it.
I hope they do find it though. It means that I will therefore have 80% more of everything which can't be bad? It'll play havoc with property prices though as home owners will suddenly realise they are selling 80% more of a home than they thought and will presumably up their prices as a result?
I wonder what they'll dream up next? White Matter? [It’s principal characteristic is that it doesn’t exist, so if you do manage to find it then you’ve obviously found something else] Green Matter? [It’s always somewhere else] Purple Matter? [It only exists when you’re not looking for it]
Science is an unending source of fascination.
It was a lot more boring in the old days when we just had Protons, Neutrons and Electrons.
How ignorant we were.