Signing up for a fight
I have a feeling I am going to have a fight on my hands in the next couple of months.
Sometime between now and September I am half expecting a letter demanding money, and I have absolutely no intention of paying.
You may remember [but probably won’t] that I wrote a year and a half ago about how they had installed little meter boxes and a new water main up my lane. I wrote how they left a length of blue pipe sticking out of the ground that presumably is supposed to provide my water.
Since then, nothing has happened. I buried the length of blue pipe for no other reason than it looked fucking ugly, and their little meter box thingy is now covered under half an inch of dried mud from all the rain we had last winter. Quite honestly I had forgotten all about the whole thing.
I have been warned however that the crowd who have taken charge of these meters will be contacting me soon. They will be looking for my personal details, including my RSI [revenue] number. Now I have no intention of giving them any information, least of all my RSI, as they are a semi-private company and it is none of their fucking business. Presumably they will also demand that I connect my house to their little bit of blue pipe, which I also have no intention of doing. What they do out in the lane is their business, but what goes on on my land is my business and not theirs.
My argument is quite simple.
I do not have a contract with these people. A contract requires Cause, Consideration and Consent, and I never gave my consent. I never agreed nor did I sign anything therefore there is no contract. And if there is no contract, they can't demand money off me.
Doubtless they won't take this lying down but that's their problem. They can argue, threaten and cajole but the fact remains – I have no contract nor agreement with them. Any communication I receive will be dealt with politely but firmly – I have no contract and I have no intention of entering into a contract or agreement therefore they not only don't get my cash, but they don't get any information from me that I deem to be any of their business.
What's more, if they persist in hassling me I shall be forced to charge them for my time.
€1,000 an hour should just about cover it?
Addresse Not Reconised. No Contract. Return to Sender.
If the envelope they send has a little window in in then stick a label over the window and send the bugger back.
If they send a man in hi viz round well you have that one covered.
EU regulations do not permit any water company from disconnecting a water supply from an 'inhabited' property. Inhabitant is word water companies despise and seem reluctant to use.
Have I heard somewhere that the EU has outlawed demands from companies without contracts?
well add to that you aren't receiving their water out of the pipe anyway
I'll tell 'em they can disconnect their meter anytime that suits them.
More power to ya'!
Bastille Day happened recently Grandad. For your campaign against the water torturers you can take inspiration from La Marseillaise. Here are some translated lyrics ;
To arms citizens Form your battalions
March, march
Let impure blood
Water our furrows
What do they want this horde of slaves
Of traitors and conspiratorial kings?
For whom these vile chains
These long-prepared irons?
Frenchmen, for us, ah! What outrage
What methods must be taken?
It is us they dare plan
To return to the old slavery!
Aux armes citoyens! Gardons le bon Grandpere.
I should use that last line as my motto. It would confuse the hell out of everyone [except French speakers?]