Safer Internet Day
Today is Safer Internet Day.
What is Safer Internet Day, you ask?
I haven’t a fucking clue.
I had a poke around their website and discovered that this earth shattering event occurs every year on the second day of the second week of the second month of the second year of the second century. Or something. Nothing like fixing a date, huh?
I delved further and found… nothing really. I was disappointed. The least they could have done is given us a list of really decent porn sites to avoid.
It transpires that this is yet another one of those fucking “let’s keep the children safe” efforts, sponsored naturally by our profligate friends in the EU. If this world is so appallingly dangerous for children then why did you breed the little fuckers in the first place? Any mention of children now just switches me off. I no longer care a jot about them. Let the little bastards eat, smoke and drink themselves to death for all I care. If they have night terrors because of something they have seen on the Interweb well, tough shit for allowing them access in the first place. You ply them with mobile phones so they can surf the porn and bully each other on the “social” sites so it is your fucking fault and not mine.
I checked to see what “events” were happening here to celebrate this auspicious day. Nothing. A load of bullshit and waffle about safety initiatives and the fucking ubiquitous “awareness”. The least I would have expected is that they set up a hall with a thousand computers and a thousand children and then teach them how to switch the fucking things off.
When the grandchldren visit, I have no problems with them using the Interweb. I allow them unsupervised access because their choice of site is none of my business.
I am aware of safety though.
I insist they wear seatbelts and crash helmets at all times.
I wonder is it safe to smoke while surfing the net today?
Of course it is. But just for today, make sure there is a fire extinguisher nearby. Can't be too careful?
I think I shall drink some Chardonnay and surf for porn tonight!
So there. And thumbs down to yer safe internet day.
Don't forget to enjoy a decent corona while you surf?
Gave up smoking three years ago thanks.
Should have gone back for one evening in honour of the occasion?
I think it's a jolly good idea, and none too soon. All this internet porn has disfigured me. I've got a right arm like Popeye and a left arm like Kate Moss. We should be protected from this sort of sing. I think something should be done. They should ban something. Or other. It's the only way. Or better still, they should ban the internet. That would fix it.
Sort of sing? Shurley musht be shome mishtake…
That would be 'thing'….. Damn, this local wine has a kick to it…
Probably about 20% ABV, seeing as how my mate made it. He likes his wine 'robust'.
Yeah, tell us more about these porn sites we should, ehm… avoid. I'll get a pen and paper, just to be sure I don't visit them. By accident.
Ah, it's a joke, isn't it. All this talk of safety by corporations and Governments, and all the while they're shafting us. It's not about safety, it's about not getting sued.