Why do people insist on asking me if I am all set for Christmas?
What do they think I am?
A slab of concrete?
What is there to be set about? I have the basic essentials of life, and enough of them to last me into the middle of next week – tobacco, whiskey and bread. What more do I need to be set?
Usually when they ask I either say “of course” or “not at all” depending on my mood. Mostly it the women who ask the question, and it’s irrelevant how I reply as they will invariably launch into a tale of woe about how unprepared they are and how much they have to do yet.
The term “all set” is a colloquialism for “ready”, but somehow the question “are you ready for Christmas” is never used. If someone asked me if I was ready for Christmas I would say of course I am, bring it on, but somehow that reply doesn’t settle well with the “all set” version.
So how about you lot?
Are you all nearly solidified for Christmas?