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In case of emergency — 14 Comments

  1. You haven’t got your wedding suit out of mothballa, have you?  Buttons on a fly go with memories of long speeches by the bride’s uncle Freddie who is well oiled and thinks he’s hilarious telling stories.

  2. Ian – Brand new trousers, unfortunately.  I am baffled… what having speeches to do with flies?  Did Uncle Freddie have his open during the speech?!

  3. Welcome Manwiddicombe!  That’s a good point.  Would it have to be shatter-proof?  Frosted?  I think I’s still prefer a zip.


  4. If you had ever trapped a portion of your foreskin in a zip*, I think that you may have written another text today.
    * My son did – very painful and embarrassing at the hospital.

  5. Trapping various parts of my anatomy is a risk I am willing to take.  Anyway, after decades of practice it’s not a problem I worry about.

    Another text?  Where? Did I miss something?

  6. Sounds like a scene from Cinderella – Buttons, Buttons, where the fuck is he.
    It wouldn’t fly if his name was Zip.

  7. Slab – Very very true.  Actually these aren’t Levis.  I’m not sure what they are but to check, I’d have to remove them.  I ain’t doing that.  Too many fucking buttons.

  8. Maybe it’s me, but I have the opposite problem, not enough buttons !! Has anyonr else noticed that most jeans are missing one button ? My older jeans have 5 buttons most new ones have only 4.Even the zips are shorter, had a row with the manager in a Levi store just for asking the difference between mens’ and ladies’ jeans and how a man could piss standing up without taking one’s trousers down ?!!

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