I had to nip down to the village earlier.

While I was down there, I thought I would drop into Doc’s surgery.  Don’t worry – I’m not sick or anything – it’s just that he owes me a few bob after a poker session the other night.

Before I go any further, I should explain that Doc insists on locating his surgery upstairs.  This is apparently a deliberate ploy on his part as he says that it cuts down drastically on the number of patients [such as those with broken lower limbs or those with arthritis] so he has more time to himself.

Anyhows, I entered the front door, and there were two old dears coming down the stairs.  As they were both old enough to be my granny, I stood to one side to let them down.  They took ages.  Finally they reached the bottom step and the younger of the two realised I was there.  She squinted at me, and I saw a flash of recognition on her face. 

“Howya Mick!” says she.

“Howya!” says I in return, just to be polite.

The older then peered at me which was slightly unnerving.

“Ah, hello Mick!” the older one said.

“Hello!” says I.

They made their way out the door, presumably wondering why Mick wasn’t very chatty today.

I saw them again a wee while later when I entered the grocers.  They both glared at me and one remarked to the other that Mick turning very rude in his old age. 

I don’t know who this Mick is, but I’ll have to find him.  I can’t have blokes wandering freely in the countryside if they look anything like me.  That is just not on.  I have a reputation to upkeep.

This village is only big enough for one of us.