What the hell is going on in the world of films?
I like to watch the odd film, and Herself is addicted to them. In fact I have one of those satellite thingies which means I have hundreds of channels and some of those channels are devoted to films. The satellite costs an arm and a leg, but it calms Herself down of an evening, and is cheaper than tranquilisers.
The problem is though that there are never any films on worth watching.
The films that are being produced these days are the greatest load of unadulterated shite. The film makers seem to be catering almost exclusively for the young teen market and for those with an IQ level in the low twenties [same thing really].
There seems to be three genres of films – The “romantic comedy” [or RomCom as they nauseatingly refer to it], kids films and films that rely almost exclusively on blood, gore and pyrotechnics for the plotline.
The “RomCom” [fuckit but I detest that word] invariably stars Jennifer Aniston and is about as funny as sticking rusty nails into my eyeballs. The word RomCom in the information about the film is quite sufficient for me to ignore it completely.
The kids’ films seem to be in the majority these days. They range from those horrific cartoon-like films such as “Avatar” or “Toy Story” through to crap like “The Pirates of the Caribbean”. The worst thing about this class of film is that they seem incapable of doing anything other than rehashing the first film into a series of fucking sequels, each worst than the last.
The last class of film seems to be aimed at your average twelve year old who just loves a bit of violence. I accidentally saw the beginning of one the other night and quite honestly I was nauseated. Within ten minutes of the film starting, I was greeted with such sites as people being impaled on steel spikes [in slow motion] and a girl being dismembered and squashed by a flying object in great graphic detail. It was gratuitous violence for no other reason than to attract the brain-dead.
The only people who seem to be able to make films these days are the British and the Australians. Unfortunately, they don’t make that many, but the ones they do produce are generally worth watching.
And a note to my American friends –
Will you please stop calling films “Movies”? It makes you sound like you are still impressed with the idea of pictures that actually move.