Rampant sex every hour — 22 Comments

  1. Are you being methaphorical now?  Do you really have Pet Guinea pigs?
    There isn’t a lady next door called minnie is there?

  2. SAm – I do indeed have guinea pigs.  If it were metaphorical, I shudder to think what it would be a metaphor for?

  3. This morning I was reading about a peacock that fell in love with a giant tortoise, and a jackdaw that fell in love with a human. So count yourself lucky that it’s only baby guinea pigs you’re getting, and not some kind of unnatural mutant hybrids.

  4. Stan – If there are baby guinea pigs, I shall be more than surprised.  Two females?  Immaculate conception?

  5. I thought for “Fizz” you might have meant “The wife”, and “Minnie” was “The extremely Fat Lady who lives next door, but is in to a bit of lesbian action”…
    But you were referring to Guinea-pigs *coughs* it seems.

  6. Stan – Are you suggesting I chuck ’em in the lake?  Not a bad idea………..

    SAm – You have a strange mind.  I am so sorry to disappoint.

  7. Ah GD, you’ve turned into some sort of David ‘the voyeur’ Attenborough! Just leave the critters to it and Fizz ‘ll get over the shyness! Minnie’s probably cursin ya for hanging around and spoiling her fun!

  8. Mick – For fuck’s sake! Do you think I have nothing better to do than sit around all day watching those two?  I am minding my own business.  They are the ones making the racket.

  9. Rhodester – Age? Fair enough. Height? Spot on.  Bald????  You must be kidding?  And as to the weight?  You could knock nearly 100lbs off!!

  10. Ah, poor frustrated minnie. How about giving her a little cuddly toy animal to fool around with? You know, like budgies have those plastic coloured bird things on a spring, fixed to their perches to kiss and jump on and chatter to. I don’t suppose minnie would mind what species it is, as long as it’s soft and willing – and if it had a squeaky noise inside too, well… minnie bliss! Hopefully.

  11. Geri – That’s the problem.  She has a furry little toy [Fizz].  The latter is not too happy going a toygirl.

  12. *sigh*  It’s Fuzz!
    I keep telling you… Fizz was actually Christened FUZZ, an abbreviated form of ‘Fuzzy’.  You must be giving her a wicked identity crisis, no wonder she’s not in the mood.
    Although – it could always be Fizz, short for Fizzgig from the Dark Crystal.  Yes okay Fizz it is then.  We shall change her title by deedpole.  We’ll have to think of an extension for it to make up for her discomfort.  Like Zoe, formally named Zozimus StJohn D’ Montfort, the proudest Jack Russell on the block.

  13. Wow that’s one sexy babe man – can you give her my number?
    BTW we pigs aren’t toys mofo. Is a nuclear weapon a toy?
    You watching us? Dude – we are watching you – monkey boy.

  14. Sighs – Send me your address and I’ll pop them in an envelope to you.  And I know you’re not toys.  You can take the batteries out of toys.

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