A scene anywhere in Ireland
Scene: The Boss’s office.
The Boss is sitting behind his desk looking unhappy.
Enter Me [stage left].
Me: Waddya want, Boss?
Boss: I hope you don’t mind me bringing this matter up, but we think you may have been helping yourself to cash from the till.
Me: So?
Boss: Well… That’s not really allowed, you know.
Me: It’s allowed all right. I think you’ll find it in my terms of employment somewhere. It’s called ‘perks of the job’.
Boss: Look. I am terribly sorry, but we may just have to give you a little slap on the wrist. Just for appearances sake, you understand?
Me: Hold on now! You can’t do things like that. It’s just not on.
Boss: All right then. We’ll leave it at that.
Me: Thanks. By the way, I have been screwing your daughter as well.
Boss: Oh! Then maybe you should resign?
Me: I’ll think about it.
Boss: Please? Pretty please? With a cherry on top?
Me: Oh, all right then. I’ll resign next year.
Boss: That’s very decent of you.
Me: I keep the company car, by the way. And I want my pension doubled. And I get to screw your daughter whenever I feel like it. Maybe your wife as well?
Boss: And will you resign then?
Me: If I get a couple of million in my bank account first.
Boss: OK. Thanks. It’s very good of you to do the decent thing.
Me: You’re welcome.
Exit Me, stage right with a fucking great grin on my face.
Depressing isn’t it?
Still though, if I could I would and I doubt anybody would be any different.
Maxi – What is frightening is the number of people, from O’Donoghue, through countless board members [FAS, Banks, etc?] who could fit the bill.
What to do? Coup? McVeigh? V?
Thrifty – Guevara?
Let ’em keep going. There’ll be a bullet put in one of them soon enough as there is always someone who loses the cool.
And then they’ll all be trembling at home screaming for Gardai to surround their house. Fuck ’em.
They’re so bleedin thick skinned you’d need a blunderbuss just to dent them!
It’ll happen alright Mick. It’ll take some hothead getting his house or flat repossessed or car lifted and one of the political gobshytes will get done in.
I have a big bag of popcorn ready just in case.
I wonder wonder would Terry Rogers give me decent odds on it happening soon.
Apparently bookies won’t give odds on certain things like people being asassinated. Its political madness gone correct.
Now why couldn’t I have had service like that when I was working 🙁