Ask Grandad – Help is at hand — 7 Comments

  1. Sorry Grandad but I couldn’t let it pass without comment. Ireland 1 Bulgaria 1

    Y’all failed to beat the guys working on fixing up The Manor ?

  2. well, whatcha know! And there was I thinking that gingers were superior beings, with enhanced brainpower and skills and abilities coming out of every ginger pore. I stand corrected.

    Thing is, if having ginger peculiarities makes a ginger physically stand out from the crowd to the extent of being prey for hunters, wouldn’t they have been made extinct by early 21st century??

    there ya go, Grandad, another problem for you to figure out.

  3. Aye Grandad,

    Your response to my retorical nonsense question is a deeply philosophical and ridiculous retort and does little to clarify for personality #1: When we hit “send” are we sending not just words but our spirits into the nowhere land of the web as a form of astrial projection ? # 2 wonders: If this is paradise then why do I feel like I’m living in Hell ?
    (An hey, neither Father Murphy or the nuns could answer that one.) Thus, your diagnoses is somewhat correct as I do find myself talking in a different voice to the likes of yourself and other disembodied spirits out there in cyberspace.

    And yes, I did seek professional help, I tried to join Paranoids Anonymous bit they wouldnt tell me where the meeting was.

    Normally I would consult with my American spiritual advisor, Old Grandad Kentucky Bourbon with such knotty questions but your offer for free help was just too tempting. It is comforting to know that #1 can go to Kentucky Old Grandad, pop the cork, let the jenni out of the jug and widely speculate till the cock crows, # 2 now has a Irish Grandad to drive him to distraction on his road to ruin.

    An, is the blood in the kitchen from the bloody steak we had for dinner that the cat tried to grab or, where the hell is the cat, and whats that fresh mound in the garden ?

    Yea, Grandad, you’ve been a great help, I will indeed reccomend you to all my old pals at the Funny Farm. Expect a flood of mail


  4. Thank you Ian for articulating for Grandad the essense of imperical inquiry….An that Kristie is one Hot Ginger ! I’d love to superlocate some of my atoms her way for a nuclear reaction….

  5. TT – Am I right in thinking you are referring to some sport or other? Yu should know by now that I’m not interested in that kind of thing.

    Charmed – There are damned few of them left. They are like pipe smokers – an endangered species [pipe smokers should be protected though].

    Ian – Ah! Dear Kirsty. As for my reply to RWG, I deliberately avoided quantum mechanics as I didn’t want to confuse the poor chap.

    RWG – You now tell me that your question was nonsense? You are obviously in a state of denial and the sooner you get help the better.

    You ask the question “If this is paradise then why do I feel like I’m living in Hell ?”
    The answer is simply that paradise isn’t the shit hot place they make it out to be. It’s all a conspiracy.

    Sadly, Kirsty is no longer with us.

  6. Well as your Taoiseach Brian Cowen has made clear in this morning’s paper:

    …”we don’t all have crystal balls.”

    Actually I wasn’t aware that anyone did – but that’s neither here nor there.

    Is he perhaps a Ginger in disguise?

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