The end of the recession
I have a very simple solution to Ireland’s financial problems.
I hear that Mugabe has no further use for his Zimbabwe Dollar.
Fair enough.
Why don’t we quit the Euro and adopt the Zimbabwe Dollar?
We can adapt it to our own needs.
I reckon we could buy it at an exchange rate of about one Euro for Z$50,000,000
We would have to rename it, of course.
Just think –
It is deflation proof.
And we would all be multi-millionaires.
Sorted.
Never mind that, I’ve started to print my own money.
Turns out no one gives a shit about the forgery. The government is just happy I’m not on the dole taking theirs.
I’ve given up money. I only use the bartering system now. Eggs for cheese, looms for petrol, Goats for iphones. It’s working well.
Maxi – Can you lend us a few quid?
Red – What’s the going rate for pipe tobacco?
Nice idea Grandad but you couldve washed your thumbs before you took the photo. Plus I don’t like the look of them bananas.
Dangerously close to the truth, Grandad. There are people who say we should leave the Euro.
Of course, in anticipation of our departure and the collapse of our new currency; everyone fit to walk will go to the North to buy Sterling, or will hide their Euros in biscuit tins in the mattress to avoid them being changed into Punts. On its launch, the Irish currency will immediately depreciate, leading to a run on what’s left of the banks, and the need to raise interest rates to 20%. The last business will leave and we will be left with a land of frugal pleasures and comely maidens dancing at the crossroads.
No more currency changes PLEASE!!! I’ve only just got the watermark right on my printing plates. And my cent coins have all been glued together for the foreign slot machines. My business is at risk here.
This cunning plan of the Bank of England is dispicable – vis a vis Ireland. I will say no more – well perhaps.
Where is my pal/rival Maynard Keynes now?
I have bad dreams of the future from this post: slotting in my Zim Dollar 100,000 coin into my solar-powered mobile shopping scooter with internet access plus Shitter (c) [upgrade of Twitter (c)] and cursing 2008 bank bail-outs from my pension fund while I scour the shelves in IKEA FOOD on [the entire] Western Grafton Street for cheap Wexford wine. 🙂
There was a yoke on the BBC last night [on the News?] about PIIGS. Apparently that what they call us now in Europe – Portugal, Italy, Ireland, Greece and Spain being five countries who are in danger of losing the Euro as currency. I may be joking, but as Ian says I might be close to the truth. Am I not lucky that I held onto all those thousands of Punts?