Where are Geldof and Bono when you need them? — 26 Comments

  1. Time to emigrate to West Cavan. My husband smokes a pipe and we have tobacco aplenty in all the service stations and post offices. (Of course they’re also selling tins of soup that expired in 2001, but you learn to be careful) I’m holding to my aforementioned conspiracy theory here, you know.

  2. Sounds like the withdrawals to me… The famine will end soon, no doubt. What the heck happened to the tobacco in the first place? Is there a strike on over there or something? 🙂

  3. I know a fella who knows a fella if you get my drift? Can arrange a shipment of all the finest blends!

  4. bloody hell, thought for sure you had some by now. send me your address and the brand name and i’ll see if i can find it here (we have a nice tobacco shop) and i’ll friggin mail you some.

  5. Perhaps the Pip Tobacco shipment was coming by sea and happened to go past Somali, or at least they tried to. I mention this as an alternative to my first theory, but I check an they don’t grow Tobacco in the Gaza Strip.

  6. Brianmc – Atrocious is not the word! That bloke is getting too big for his boots. Just because he has met a president or two……..!

    Susan – Moving to Cavan is a bit drastic? I like my mountains, and all you have there are molehills. I’d be tempted under the circumstances though. 😐

    Tricia – I would dearly love to know where all my tobacco has gone. There are no strikes or anything. It’s a conspiracy!

    Robert – I would have thought that too, but I have seen a couple around. Maybe they are seagulls in disguise?

    NaRocRoc – I get your drift. Has he got any Moroccan?

    Prin – That is a very kind offer. I doubt they sell my brand over there though. Even though it’s a Virginia tobacco, it’s blended over here, and they are unlikely to ship it all the way back?

    Jim C – That’s a nice theory, but what really pisses me off is that everywhere else has plentiful supplies. I have just done a twenty mile round trip and bought myself a grand stash. Each week though, I’m having to drive further and further as I clean out the stocks.

  7. You think you have it bad! I just ordered one of those ReadHambles books from Amazon UK and the fuckers soaked me almost $22!!

  8. Poor Grandad!

    I’d send you some back from Singapore but they might hang me, or you, or both of us.

    It’d save the kittens though?

  9. TT – Piss off. That’s piracy.

    Xbox – That’s probably where all mine is? Send it over now.

  10. Maxi – Too late. They were all sacrificed to the cause last week.

    Stipes – Hah! The first thing I did was rob all his supply.

    Baino – Better than the same. Can you please ship 50Kg immediately and a further 100Kg per week? Thanks.

    Sarah – Welcome! I nearly missed you after your wee delay in moderation. I believe you have some ‘interesting’ variants on the tobacco theme in your neck of the woods? Add them to my Australian imports, and I might forget about tobacco altogether?

  11. Someone get this man some smoke! I could send you some from the states, but it might make you have the munchies. 😉

  12. I think you should be more stoic and less hysterical. There is never ever any need to call upon Bono or Geldof (I would also lump Chris Martin in there), you may get your wish and be swarmed by self righteous pop stars telling everone to donate money for another crisis.

    My suggestion would be to take back the colonies from the Septics and have your own tobacco plantation, you could staff it with ex-Delll employeees from Limerick.

  13. King Bob – Me? Hysterical? I have never been hysterical in my life! I’m just pissed off at the famine. It’s nearly three weeks now, so would you blame me? I do have my own ‘tobacco’ plantation, but I try to keep quiet about it, after that last raid.

  14. I have some of that stuff you use in a hookah, which is very flavoursome, you are welcome to try some in your pipe. I have Pistachio, Rose petal and some other sort of flavours, I feel quite cultured on my Wickla patio smoking my hookah.

  15. Grandad…I’m not quite sure what the variants on tobacco are here…to be honest I’m too scared to try anything not government sanctified…ever see The Glass Palace?

    Just back from Indonesia where they have Kretek though…these are really strong fags with a filter of cloves and sugar…gorgeous. I have found a new vice.


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