An ill wind
I believe there are high winds forecast for tomorrow night.
I hate strong winds.
I used to work in a job which involved working on the tops of ladders. And climbing a ladder in a strong wind is not funny, especially when you have both hands full of equipment.
We used to complain to the boss that there were safety issues, as we worked solo, and had nobody to hold the ladder in a wind. He told us to shut the fuck up if we wanted a job.
One day, it was blowing a storm, and I went into the boss, and told him it wasn’t safe out there. He told me to shut the fuck up and to get out there if I wanted a job.
So I went.
It was a rough day, and I had a few hairy moments during strong gusts, but I clung on.
I arrived at one house, where I climbed the ladder up onto a flat roof. I was up there, when there was another powerful gust. The ladder went. It went with a nice screech and a crash and landed in the next door garden.
Unfortunately for the neighbour, his car got in the way. A nice cracked windscreen, a lovely dent in the wing and a pretty pattern of scratches all down the front.
The neighbour came out, and he didn’t seem too happy. You see, he had bought the car, brand new, the week before and he was very proud of it. I had to stand on the flat roof and let him tell me exactly what he thought of me and my ladder and how he was going to wrap that ladder around my neck and sue me until I hadn’t a penny left. I let him finish and then had to ask him politely if he would mind very much putting the ladder back up again, as I was stuck on the roof.
Of course, by the time I got back to the office that evening, the car owner had phoned them and told them what had happened. I got called in and had strips torn off me for climbing a ladder in unsafe conditions.
You just can’t win.
When I left that job, I nicked the ladder. I still have it. In fact, I used it yesterday to clean my gutters.
But there was no wind yesterday.
I’ve often wondered if bosses are born assholes or is there some kind of training course they have to pass?
The strange thing is that I used to be best mates with that bloke. When he was promoted to management, he became an asshole overnight. I think they inject them with something?
To climb the ladder of success, one must start at the bottom rung and prevail against the mighty winds of adversity, if one desires to stand upon the rooftop of good fortune and compete with the neighbor of commerce over the dings and dents of trial and error that are inflicted upon the automobile of democracy.
Or, maybe just quit and get a better job.
RhodesTer – You’ve been reading cereal boxes again? As it happened, I was eventually promoted to an office job, where I still spent a lot of time on the road but NO LADDERS!!
That boss suffered from Swelled head Syndrome!
I thought you were going to say that the neighbour refused to put the ladder back.
Grannymar – You have no idea what my bosses were like!!!! The neighbour took pity on me in the end. I had to do some fierce pleading though.
Hmmmm an injection you say? No wonder I’m a shit boss, I was out ‘sick’ the day that the company doctor came in…
If the neighbour had got hold of Grandad, I’d say he’s have been suffering from that too!
I hope you tie your ladder on to something these days, Grandad
H – You can’t be a boss. You have a sense of humour.
Steph – I think that era was the beginnings of the development of Grandad.
As for tying the ladder? First safety rule of ladders – “Always make sure the top of the ladder is tied securely before commencing to climb”. Think about it…………!
I know it’s hard to believe Grandad, but I’m actually “responsible” for running two companies…
…Incidentally, there’s 50+ people in North Kildare who’s jobs are on the line due to managerial incompetence. Oops.
@ H …I wish the same would apply to the HSE – talk about managerial incompetance! They are the ones suffering from ‘system’ failure, not Portlaoise.
H – That’s nothing. I’m responsible for ruining three. Oh! Sorry. You said running?
Steph – This country has a blind spot when it comes to management. All companies seem to be run by accountants now, where balancing the books is far more important than the end product. The HSE is a prime example.
You can’t really call anyone in the HSE a manager. That would imply that they actually ‘manage’ something. The term ‘long-standing civil service employee’ would be more apt.
Grandad, how is it that you had an “office job” yet spent a lot of time on the road? Wouldn’t that be a “road job”? What if you had to “blow” during that time.. what would that be? 😉
RhodesTer – Mornings in the office, and afternoons out on the blow. But no ladders.
Sounds traumatic. Clearly to this day you have issues with that event. I’d be suing for post traumatic stress disorder 🙂
Thrifty – Nah! I’m well over it. But I still think back to those days whenever there is a good wind blowing. Nowadays, I’m more concerned about trees blowing down.