My funniest article
Today, I was going to write my funniest, most incisive piece to date.
I was in stitches at the thought of what I was going to say.
But I could be bothered.
The sun is shining. Someone is even cutting their grass. Spring has apparently sprung.
I think I’ll have a nap instead.
And if anyone wakes me, I’ll fucking kill you…….
Knock Knock,KNOCK KNOCK,Oh hello I am from the USA and i am lost could you show me how to get BOOM BOOM?
I used to be a door-to-door salesman. There’s nothing like been woken up from a nice mid-day nap to be asked if you’re thinking of changing your facia or soffits. It was the best part of the job in a way.
You’re lucky the ESB is holding up the builders next door. Did you give them a call 😉
You’ve made the short list of an award list – again. Do you mind not being so talented please.
Popeyemoon – That is the first suicidal comment I have ever seen!
Sean – Actually I was woken by the man delivering my groceries. I can’t be nasty to him. Some people in this world are important. [Not many though]
Neighbour – Actually, I canceled the ESB altogether. If they start messing around next door, I get cut off, and I can’t have that. Don’t tell Them Next Door though.
Incidentally, did you like the way I burned the roof off their house?
Flirty – Did I? Oh shit!! So I did. Wow. 🙂 [I’ve only just woken up….]
Hey!! We’re in competition.. 🙂 And you got two nominations. Congratulations 😆
The roof was rotten (so is yours), so they were happy to replace it. Seems they have a double order of roofing timber now, as no-one could locate the carpenter that went missing from the job.
You wouldn’t happen to know where he went?
The sun is shining? Damn. I guess I better open the curtains and get out of bed then.
Neighbour – Stop casting nasturtiums at my roof. It’s been there for 200 years. It’s fine.
Carpenter? Missing? Dear me.. I wonder what happened to him?
Robert – Don’t bother. It’ll probably snow in a few minutes.
Ok, I’ll take your word for it. I’m going back to sleep. Good luck.
Congrats on shortlisting mate! No sleeping now you have to keep going!
The sun is indeed shining. Doesn’t life just improve immeasurably when that happens? If I were you, I’d have the deck chair out in the garden in a trice! Sadly, I have work to do 🙁
*yawn*
Grannymar – See you there……. 😉
Karyn – I think I’ll wait a degree or two before I lie out, if you don’t mind?