Smoking is good for you
Whenever there is a survey about health, they invariably ask if you smoke.
They then ask how many cigarettes a day.
But they never mention a pipe. And I often wondered how pipe smoking equated to cigarette smoking. I meant to ask the Doctor. And then it struck me – why not look it up on the Interweb?
So I did.
And what I found surprised even me.
Apparently, a pipe-smoker who smokes up to four bowlfuls of tobacco a day can have a longer life expectancy than someone who doesn’t smoke at all.
Several reports have shown this. Including one by our friend the Surgeon General of the United States.
Of course the Anti Smoking Nazis would have us believe that even thinking about tobacco is enough to bring on a brain tumour, so the idea of smoking prolonging life is pure heresy.
So how can the pipe be healthy, if tobacco is so evil? Simple.
The key to the whole issue lies in stress.
When calculating a persons expected lifespan, there are many factors to consider – heredity, lifestyle, general health and mental well-being.
Of these, mental well-being is considered to be one of the greatest factors. Being happy and relaxed in you life is enough to add years onto your life expectancy. Relaxation is the key. Stress is the killer.
To me, every aspect of cigarette smoking screams of stress – frantically jamming the fag in the mouth; the rapid dragging on it and the final stabbing of the cigarette in the ashtray. Pipe smoking is a ritual. By its nature, it’s a relaxing process – the careful packing of the tobacco into the pipe; the ritual of lighting it [a quick stab of a lighter isn’t good enough here], and then sitting back and enjoying it. I even find the process of cleaning a pipe relaxing. People even say that the sight of another person smoking a pipe is relaxing.
People accuse me of inventing the stuff I write about. I’m very hurt by that, but I’ll let it pass.
I will quote from the Surgeon General of the United States in his report on the dangers of tobacco.
Specifically, this report confirmed what had been suspected for quite some time, that cigarette smoking could be dangerous. However, the conclusion drawn from several studies about pipe smokers was that they tended to live longer than the general population!
So. Throw away those damned cigarettes. They stink, and they are dangerous.
Put it in your pipe and smoke it.
My boyfriend has been planning to ditch the fags for a pipe for a while now, I think this could be the convincing he needs.
I sincerely hope so. Tell him to go for it. It takes a little getting used to but it’s worth it.
I started on cigarettes [don’t all smokers!] but switched to the pipe about 35 years ago. I haven’t smoked a cigarette since. They are revolting by comparison.
“So. Throw away those damned cigarettes. They stink, and they are dangerous”.
Yeah! So, why promote them on your header?
I’ve no problem with pipe smokers btw 😀
Good point, Steph. I keep meaning to change that fag to a pipe!
Sorry to nag – but I suppose you’re lucky I can’t use the frying pan! 😉
Is that better???? *sigh*
Don’t worry about the nagging. After over thirty years of marriage, I’m impervious.
I believe all this but I would think procuring the ‘tobacco’ to put in the pipe would be very stressful, what with having to walk around parks at night and having to deal with those guys haging on the corner and then sometimes the ‘Mexican’ tobacco isn’t as good as the ‘salesman’ claims. I guess if you grew your own ‘tobacco’ at home from Hawaiian seeds, that would be OK.
No problems there, Brianf. Between my circle of friends, and the myriad of plants on the window ledge, I’m fine. My local shop supplies my tobacco too.
😉
Such talent. I’m impressed GD!
Happy puffing!
I wonder would a pipe suit me?
If so which kind?
Grannymar – Try this one.
🙂
Perfek!
Pity I didn’t have it in time for the wedding. The colour was just right!!!
Granddad:
You’re barking up the wrong tree on that one. Tobacco nazis want to outlaw tobacco in any form including smokeless. And furthermore I can
show you plenty of fag smokers who live as long as pipe smokers.
In my observation, people who sit around nursing on a pipe and looking wise don’t work very hard.
So you changed the No Smoking sign above. Nice one!
I’m not barking up any tree, Joe. I know the Tobacco Nazis want to ban ALL smoking.
All I am doing is repeating what I found from searching the Interweb – many people saying that moderate pipe smoking is actually beneficial. In the same way that moderate wine drinking reduces heart disease.
I know of fag smokers who lived into their nineties. I know of non-smokers who died of lung cancer in their forties.
Maybe the fact that pipe smokers take a wee while to relax away from the stress of work is the key to the matter. Too many people are living to work, rather than working to live.
No, Grannymar. I changed the Smoking sign. 😉
Granddad, did your Interweb search explain why pipe smokers live longer than fag smokers when it’s the same damn thing?
If you’ll dig a little deeper you’ll find that tobacco has no effect whatever on longevity or health and anybody who says otherwise and quotes phony numbers is a baldfaced liar.
The “Surgeon General” you quote–Richard Carmona– is a professional prevaricator who was fired for telling a tale a mother wouldn’t believe.
Well if relaxation is the key, then obviously if you drink heavily you’ll live to at least 120. I mean, how relaxed can you get – slumped in a chair, all your senses completely befuddled, in fact you often pass out from sheer serenity. Hmm, I think there’s a flaw in this argument somewhere….
Joe – There is a world of difference between pipes and cigarettes. Any twat should know that. Cigarettes are full of chemicals [like saltpetre to keep them lit] that aren’t in pipe tobacco. Also cigarettes are inhaled, where a pipe generally isn’t.
There is little comparison between them.
“If you’ll dig a little deeper you’ll find that tobacco has no effect whatever on longevity or health and anybody who says otherwise and quotes phony numbers is a baldfaced liar.”
False. You sound to me like one of the good old Anti Smoking Nazis, if you don’t mind me saying so?
As for calling me a liar? I won’t bother with that.
Nick – Nice argument. Though in fact it is false. Alcohol only suppresses parts of the brain [in fact it’s a depressant]. But don’t let me stop you….!!
Granddad:
The arteries to your brain are becoming clogged in your old age and
it doesn’t work as well as it used to. Even so, it has better function than half the population who believe that smelling smoke from ANY source, including your pipe, is deadly.
Can you fill me in on the safety of snuff or spit tobacco? The Nazis say that’s as deadly as smoking, even though it gets nowhere near one’s lungs. You can’t defend your right to smoke a pipe while badmouthing cigarettes. You’ll be killed by some maniac in self defense just the same.
If my statement is false you’re calling me a liar and I won’t bother with that. The Tobacco War is rightly called the Fraud of the Century. Look it up on your Interweb.
Joe – The brain is about the only bit that still works!
For a start, I’m not pro-tobacco. Given the choice, I never would have started. And I’m too old now to bother quitting. ‘Tis better to die happy than miserable!
Snuff and spit tobacco are obviously not going to cause lung cancer [not that I’ve ever tried either], but can cause other cancers. Pipe smoking can cause cancer too. BUT….. Lung cancer is very dangerous and difficult to treat, whereas mouth cancers are relatively curable.
Before you start accusing me of promoting anything that is carcinogenic, I might add that a hell of a lot of items are. Not just tobacco. I watched a programme last week where they found a lot of carcinogenics in make-up and toothpaste!
Oh,Granddad!
It’s hard to figure out out your argument. You say that pipe smoking is good for you and makes you live a long time then from the other side of your mouth that it causes cancer of the mouth which won’t kill you because it’s treatable.
I’m gonna give up on talking to you and turn you over to Richard Carmona. He’ll tell you that you’re full of____. I say you both are.
OK. Where I stand…. I’m first of all for free choice, so people shouldn’t be treated like pariahs if they smoke. I don’t like cigarettes, but that’s a personal thing [Herself smokes fags]. I do not believe any of this bullshit about ‘secondary smoking’. That is unproven hype.
I agree that smoking can cause health side effects, but so can a hell of a lot of other things. Smoking can kill. But so can driving a car, or skydiving, or swimming. The list is endless. Breathing the f*cking air is dangerous these days!
My doctor has no real problem with my taking the odd puff of a pipe. In fact, a few years ago, another doctor admitted [in private] that smoking cigarettes in extreme moderation can be good for you.
One thing I am vehemently opposed to is a society where we are all tiptoeing around in cotton wool, where we can’t do anything because it may damage us.
I had to look Richard Carmona up. He sounds like a right w*nk*r.
Who’s this Joe Camel fella . . .and did you know that Nazi is the popular keyword on Google searches in Australia – go figure – you’re publicity just went up a tad! http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,22606475-2,00.html?from=mostpop
Baino. FYI:
Joe Camel is a freedom-loving individual with a low tolerance for aggressive idiots. If you’re one of those smart a____ who insist on a bunch of crap called Godwin’s Law–use of the word “nazi” loses the argument– you can stuff it. In today’s vernacular, that term doesn’t refer to the long-defunct Third Reich, but to any authoritarian ass___.
That includes those who strut around under the umbrella of Government protection pretending to be offended by wisps of smoke and calling for bans and cheering on evil peoples’ effort to rule over a world of livestock as though THEY have something to gain.
Does that answer your question?
When I was suffering from hypertension 30 years ago my doctor concluded most of it resulted from stress. I mentioned smoking a pipe two or three times a day and he said, “It is probably doing you far more good than harm. The bad effects of the pipe are more than compensated for lessoning the stress. Find the time relax and enjoy the pipe”
Welcome Walter. This is going back in time a bit? I had a debate with my doctor along the lines that stress kills and that contentment prolongs life [he agreed with both those] and I then put the argument that smoking relaxes and produces contentment. He had to agree! Another doctor many years ago told me [in strict confidence] that he had nothing against smoking in moderation and he reckoned that i had a lot of benefits.
I the years since I wrote this piece I have done a LOT more research. All I have found is confusion, lies and very few hard facts.