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I'm not a suicide bomber

Head Rambles Posted on by

When I started this blogging, I thought I was entering a world of twentysomethings and thirtysomethings.

I called myself a “Senior Irish Citizen” to mark myself out from the young crowd. Like a dog pees against a tree to mark his territory.

But I am amazed to find that in fact my readers range in age from twenty or so to the over-eighties. A range of over sixty years! I’m only a youngster in comparison to some. It’s an eye opener, and I’m delighted.

There is one thing that gets on my tits though. There seems to be this thing in America of calling people Boomers. I hate that expression. I always thought that a boomer was some kind of code for a Russian submarine. Though, to me, it conjures up an image of a suicide bomber.

I’m not a suicide bomber! In fact I don’t really want to be labelled as an age group at all. I hate labelling. I’m not ‘old’. I’m not ‘elderly’. I’m not in my ‘golden years’. ‘Senior’ is OK, because a 15 year old is senior to a 14 year old. I used ‘Senior’ because I thought I would be older than most of my readers. So I label myself as a Grandad, because I am one. I label myself as retired, because I am. But these are ageless terms. Technically, I could be a grandfather in my thirties. Technically, I could be retired at any age.

The only title I sometimes bestow upon myself is ‘Old Fart’. This is partially correct, as Herself was giving out to me again last night for my resounding flatulence, which echoed through the halls of Head Rambles Manor.

So if people must apply some kind of label to those of us who’s lives don’t orbit around the latest episode of ‘Heros’ or Bebo or what Paris and Britney are up to, then let’s think up a new label.

Something along the line of “Thinkers” or “Experienced” or BTDTWTTS [Been there, done that, worn the t-shirt].

Any ideas?

 

Comments

I'm not a suicide bomber — 51 Comments

  1. Well, I rather like later-lifers, though it’s a bit long-winded. I certainly detest all those ghastly terms you mention. What really bugs me at my age (60) is that anything that goes wrong with me is immediately put down to Old Age. Usually complete nonsense as illnesses/disorders etc can occur at any age (arthritis, heart problems etc etc). Grossly ageist. Harumph.

  2. Later-lifers? Hmmm? Don’t know about that.

    As far as I’m concerned, I’m still somewhere in my twenties or thirties. And I’m delighted to say that any time I complain to my Doc about bits falling off, and how I must expect that at my age, he always tells me “Sure, you’re only a young lad yet!”. I like my doctor!! And I must have about twenty years on him.

    How about “Non-Bebos”? 😉

  3. BTDTWTTSBISITW[Been there, done that, worn the t-shirt but it shrank in the wash].

    Although this is new for everyone, Beboers and Silver Surfers alike (that’s what the Guardian calls BTDTWTTSBISITWs. Wonder why they don’t use acronyms like everyone else…), the younger generation takes it for granted; if you want more labels, and let me put on my academic hat, they are digital natives, whereas we (including the old 25 year olds…) are digital immigrants. And who knows, some of us might even be digital tourists, although not on your patch, Grandad, not on your cyberpatch…

  4. BTDTWTTSBISITW? Bless you!

    Silver Surfers is nearly acceptable. I know a few people who went grey in their twenties so it’s a broad enough category.

    Digital Immigrants? No. I can’t go along with that. Granted we were educated long before the age of the Internet, but it’s our generation that laid the foundations.

    How about identifying ourselves by pre-Internet technology, and calling ourselves “Slide Rulers”?

  5. BC (Before Computers) Bloggers? Hey, that might just work. BC bloggers vs AD (After Digital) bloggers.

    Okay, it ain’t funny but it’s accurate.

    Or am I perhaps full of Hooee?

  6. I propose IMMO (inside mightn’t match outside).

    I’m young in spirit, gently worn in body, eager to keep on going indefinitely!

    diane

  7. Grandad,

    How about “SEASONED CITIZENS”?

    I consider myself well seasoned.I am 79 years old and still like to have fun, which is why I read your blog.
    You are funny. You make me laugh every day even when you talk of shooting American tourists who are “Grazing” near your village.

    I’m not old, some people just think I am.

  8. Nancy – Absolutely no!!!! It makes me feel like I’m covered in salt, pepper and paprika and am ready for the barbecue.

    Incidentally, I like people who describe themselves as 79 years old. The first person to describe me as 79 years young will find their head stuck up their backside. It’s so f*cking condescending!!

    Diane – I like that. I’m an IMMO. Sounds OK? And it will confuse the Bebo crowd.

    Kirk – I like that too, but how do you pronounce it? And if I describe myself as a BC, it’s open to misinterpretation [baldy c**t, bloody curse?]

  9. How did you get my photograph?

    How about TT’s

    Time Travellers, since we have covered more than most.

  10. Elly gave it to me, Grannymar, and I superimposed in on one of myself.

    There is only one problem with TT’s – Do you fancy being called a Titty? Do I fancy being called a Titty?

  11. You are NOT a boomer – even if deep down you really want to be one. I know this will tick you off, but you aren’t American. Baby Boomers are an American phenomenon.

    OK, now that I have the last word (ha) how about
    Silver Tsunami? Silver Tsnunamcyst? (a silver haired growth on a giant wave of destruction caused by an orgasm of the earth.)

  12. I figure most folks will just ask “BC? what’s BC mean?” or something to that effect. For the few that get cocky you can do with them as you will (I remember seeing something here about someone’s head and their backside?).

    Off to mind the store. I’ll check back later.

  13. Sixty – Did I not make it plain? I do not want to be called a Boomer. I think it’s a horrible name.
    We make babies over here too. All the time. We discovered it before you did.

    Few enough people know how to pronounce ‘tsunami’. We don’t want to confuse them any further. Or do we?

    Kirk – True enough. Any excuse to shove someone’s head up his backside is always welcome [especially Sixty’s].

    Thanks for the link, by the way. 🙂

  14. Think I’ll use your cartoon to terrorize my Current Events students into paying more attention to cybersafety and sharing personal information online!

  15. Feel free, Diane. I wish I could take credit for it, but I can’t. I can’t remember where I found it!

  16. i feel cheated, grandad! i’d assumed you were 147 years old (give or take) and i now realise that you’re probably not much older than my da. not sure why that should cause me to feel cheated, but there you go.

    anyway, my great auntie marie (who’s the most genteel lady i know) refers to old age as The Craft; Can’t Remember A Fucking Thing

  17. Rosie – I’m so sorry you feel cheated. Maybe I am 147. I can’t remember.

    That is one reason why I think this should be a winner!!!

    CRAFT: Implies ability, knowledge and experience, combined within element of cunning. And, of course, the acronym is perfect.

    If only I can remember to use it!

  19. morm-jordil has declared u are not guilty grandad. aparrently u are inocent under jedi law. good luck with your endevoers.

  20. SuperShadow – I can’t decide whether you are taking the p*ss [in which case you are welcome] or are a genuine lunatic [in which case you can f*ck off]. Can you clarify please???

    Grannymar – how about

    The Craft Guild of Bloggers

  21. I will think on this one and let you know. Today I feel like an antique, but wouldn’t want to be called that either!!!

  23. Oh yeah! Beats my BC Blogger all to h*ll. The Craft Guild of Bloggers.

    And we can have apprentices, journeymen and masters. Of course they’ll each have to be defined and all that. Only those who show wisdom, insight, ingenuity, outspokeness, extreme lack of anything remotely resembling Political Correcteness (and whatever else may be decided) shall achieve the rank of Master Blogger (sounds like something out of “Beyond Thunderdome”).

    Uh…is that official? 😛

  24. “The Craft Guild of Bloggers”

    I think ‘CRAFTY’ OLD BUGGER suits you better!

    Can’t Remember a Fucking Thing – Yeh!

  25. Yeah, I’m with Steph – the other thing sounds like something from World of Warcraft.

    ‘Nay, we face a perilous journey over the Plains of Azrithor to The Craft Guild of Bloggers.‘

  28. Hi Semantic, and welcome.

    That’s a bit of a mouthfull [as the actress said to the bishop]?

    It has to be a word that people can actually spell!!

  29. mmmfmfmfphmfaaaaaa (head out of ass)
    And I’m making it clear that you CAN’T be a Boomer, so quit whining about it.
    God Bless America.

  31. So he can’t be a boomer?

    So then what the fuck are the children born in France, Germany, Russia, England and Japan after the Second World War called??

  34. Janet – Agers? It sort of implies getting old? What we need is a name that sets the ‘more mature’ apart from the young mob, without making us sound old.

    Survivors?

    Though I still like Crafts, myself!

  37. I like that. It’s a bit Irish, and therefore non-Irish may feel excluded. But then everyone in the world seems to be of Irish descent?

  39. Not all of you, surely? And I can’t class myself as a Worldwrecker [Headwrecker, maybe]?

    BlogVets?

  42. Craft is perfect I think.
    And what’s wrong with sounding like something from the World of Warcraft?? It’s a brilliant game! 🙂
    GD, I like the Craft Guild of Bloggers! No matter the name, I think it should include craft. My .02 turkish liras..

  43. I must say I am gravitating more towards Craft. It can be used in so many ways – especially when used as an adjective.

    The Craft Guild was an off the cuff suggestion. “Crafty Blogger” will do just as well…

    But how do we define the parameters? Over 40’s? Over 50’s? We can’t have any of the Bebo generation creeping in!

    😉

  44. World of Warcraft is a game for nerds. I say that, and I am an avid reader of fantasy books and a lover of video games, but World of Warcraft is just a Black Hole of Nerdiness.

    And what does the Craft Guild of Bloggers even mean? It’s like one of those meaningless phrases like work-life balance.

  45. GD, how are you going to keep anyone out by defining the parameters? You will still be read like a book. 🙂
    PS: Make it 40 so I’d be part of it in a couple of years. Oh, you have to have a way with words, I hear you say. Ok. *sulk*

  46. Well, for a start, Daz is excluded. He’s a Nerd, and a lover of video games.

    Parameters are set by self regulation. Lack of life experience will soon give an imposter away. At which point they will be locked in a dark room until they have reached the requisite requirements.

    A way with words is not a necessity. Though text-speak is an instant disqualification.

  47. I agree, life experience is the way to go. And if that’s the case that makes me around 73 (eeeg!).

    Mornin’ all (where I am at least)

  48. Parameters for “life experience” or lack of it thereof will be of importance I presume.

    Text-speak is most annoying. Thankfully noone I know texts me like that. Huzzah!

  49. Gaye – Here am I in my Grandparenthood [and that is something that is cast in stone, and can’t be undone], yet sometimes I write like a twelve year old. It is down to personal honesty I suppose.

    How do those “Boomers” in America stop a teenager from pretending to be one?

  51. Hiya Cheryl!!!! You haven’t been around in a while? Or have you?

    I like Grey Crested Boobie, but it has overtly female overtones [undertones?].

    I must resurrect this topic..

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