Last night Europe came under attack.
It was an unprovoked, surprise assault which caught us all off guard.
The European Broadcasting Commission dumped the Eurovision Dance Contest on us.
We have had the so called the Eurovision Song Contest for years now. It has descended into a farce where the same countries vote for each other year after year. The ‘songs’ have nothing to do with it. Its only redeeming feature is Terry Wogan taking the piss out of the acts.
So they have dreamt up the Eurovision Dance Contest. Even worse, they gave us Graham Norton as the compere.
GN is the worst piece of excrement ever to have come out of the arsehole of television. He has a cringe factor that is off the scale. I would rather spend a month on a desert island with Pat ‘The Plank’ Kenny than a minute with GN. And that is saying something.
I didn’t watch the programme. I did watch the voting with the sound off. They made a b*ll*x of it of course, which gave GN a chance to mince about and pull silly faces at the camera. I don’t know who won. I don’t care. I hate dancing.
It’s to be an annual event. Next year I’ll be prepared. I reckon about 500Kg of Semtex under the mast at Montrose should do it.
On a lighter note, I’ve discovered an extreme rarity – a new comedy that is funny.
‘Outnumbered‘ comes from the same stable as ‘Drop The Dead Donkey’, but what I find astounding about it is its youngest star.
She is a natural. I have never seen child acting like it before. She will go a long way [if the fame and the drugs don’t get her first].
It’s on BBC1 on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, quite late [to make sure we all miss it].
It’s not often I say anything good about television.