Electricity is the spark of life — 21 Comments

  1. Let me get this straight you are changing the floor and ceiling but not the units…………

  2. The units are only a few years old. She went out and got the most expensive one she could find – custom made. It cost more than our first house!!

    So the units and the walls are fine.

    The floor is another story which doubtless I’ll come to when it’s being laid. It’s a sore point as the old one is quite new!

  3. My brother worked for a summer with an electrician who kept giving himself shocks cos he never understood which wires were live and which weren’t. But the best one of all was the day he was up a ladder with an electric screwdriver putting up a conduit for the wires – he managed to screw his hand to the ceiling. He just stood there howling – it didn’t even occur to him to put the screwdriver in reverse to screw it back out.

    Wonder if he’s still alive…

  4. How in the name of God do you accidentally screw your hand to the ceiling? I think we have an upcoming contender for the Darwin Awards here?

  5. Fantastic, I’m with Herself. Love the makeover shows just wish I had the readies to do the work. I keep applying for those ‘come and make my garden look like a Balinese pleasure dome’ but nobody wants to touch anything bigger than 500sq m. Go Granny . . .

  6. I just wish they’d stop using the word ‘contemporary’. Every second damn word….!

    We don’t have the readies either. Herself doesn’t realise it yet, but no holidays for the next two years…

  7. It was the thin piece of flesh between thumb and forefinger. He was just really really dim… Hadn’t thought of the Darwin awards, wonder is there a prize for nominating people?

  8. Grandad How can you complain about being too busy at work and able to charge anything you want one day, and the next complain you have no readies? i think you need to audit the books and have the book keeper banged up for embezelment.

    Sheesh I know a wee accountant up in Antrim Town who might be able to help you but you will really need the readies for her

  9. Very simple, Sean.
    I get my pension. I think I would like a holiday in France next year. I work like the clappers to save for it. Herself sees the money coming in. Herself spends it.

    I won’t tell you what she wants next, but I’m going to be working a 25 hour day for the next six years!!

  10. Okay tank away herself’s cards and check book and put her on a strict 20 euro a week budget. By the time she saves up enough money for a new floor it will likely be needing replacement and it will salve you blighted brain

  11. No good. I did. She just get’s me with the frying pan or the tongue [I don’t know which is worse] until I give in.
    I like the peaceful life…. 😐

  12. Okay take the fish pie bowls and build yourself a Herself proof bunker in the garden and THEN take away her cards

  13. A “Herselfproof Bunker”? Hmmmm!

    No. It wouldn’t work. There is no material on earth that is Herselfproof.

  14. I was watching a sparky friend of mine install a new plug socket in the living room. I asked him if he wanted me to switch off the power, or at least borrow my phase tester, but he shrugged and said he’d be fine. 10 minutes later there was a loud POP from the corner. Sparky friend hadn’t budged, but was wagging his right hand like a mad thing. Apparently you can become immune to having 220V shocks. Perhaps not standing over a kitchen sink though.

  15. Actually, I said to the Gaffer that it was only 220 volts, but apparently it has gone up to 230V.

    Another bloody increase the ESB never told us about!!

  16. Grandad,

    Please tell Herself that I love the “Makeover” shows, too!
    The best lately was the one where they redid the the entire first floor of the home in a vivid ORANGE sponge paint and made lamps out of seashells and fishnetting.The people came home for the big reveal and had to pretend to be thrilled with the place,but the 5 year old kid kept shouting,”Paint it over,it’s awful.Paint it over! I HATE IT”
    The owners had to keep smiling through all of this and the decorator was trying to put a paint rag in the kid’s mouth to shut him up. Oh, Granny, you would have loved it.

  17. Umm so even the fish pie bowls arent herself proof?

    I know where theres an abandoned nuclear fall out shelter, getting in might be a problem but once in you are set

  18. Grandad,

    It has always concerned me that an electrician is called a spark. Sparks suggest faulty connections and things going wrong. A good electrician should surely be a non-spark!

  19. Good point, Ian. Why isn’t a plumber called a ‘leak’ or a builder called a ‘crack’? There is certainly justification for the latter.

  20. A plumber should be called a “next week” or an “I’ll get back to you” or “Now, the bill’s a bit bigger than I thought cos it was a bit more complicated, like” or an “Ah Missus, I was just about to phone you”

  21. No. That would be too confusing. It could apply to just about any tradesman!

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