Our council has gone round the bend
There is a lovely valley near me.
A river meanders along it and a road follows the bank of the river.
So the road meanders a bit too.
It’s a lovely road. There are mossy walls on one side and the river on the other. It is a heavily wooded valley, and the colours are beautiful at any time of year.
As I said, it’s a very twisty road with lots of bends [actually, it’s difficult to have a twisty road without bends, now that I think of it]. It is difficult to drive there at more than about 30 [or 50, in new money], and for some of the bends, you have to go a lot slower than that.
Our local council, in their infinite wisdom have decreed that this road has a limit of 50 [or 80 in new money], which is much too high. Now this is stupid, and all the locals know it. But in fairness to the council, there are loads of signs warning about not overtaking [you couldn’t anyway] and dangerous bends and more bends. There are more warning signs than bends. There are even signs warning of deer, but I’ve never seen one there.
But there are some prats out there who think that a limit sign means that that is the speed you have to use. So they try barrelling along at 50. And they come unstuck on the bends. So there are always dozens of hubcaps lying around, where they have hit the footpath. Serves ’em right.
But a couple of years ago, there was a fatality there. A car went into the river. I don’t know how that was physically possible if the signs were observed, but it happened.
The council have now decided to straighten the road. This is impossible, because there is a river on one side, and the side of the valley on the other. They are trying anyway. So far, they have succeeded in hacking down a lot of the lovely trees and have removed most of the mossy wall. They have put up great big concrete walls [that look like they were built by Hitler] instead and are covering them in granite. It must be costing a fortune.
But the bends aren’t much better. In fact they have managed to introduce one or two more.
And I’ll guarantee that when the work is finished and they have destroyed the look of the place [at great cost], they will put up a lower speed limit.
Now, why didn’t they just do that in the first place?
I think I once got chased by a sheep along that stretch of road, as a young boy. And there were no warning signs about THAT, let me tell you!
Strange. I’ve never seen an animal of any sort on that road. Must be a different road.
Why was the sheep chasing you? Was it love at first sight?
I know, they made a pig’s ear of that road. They should have commissioned priests to stand at distances of about 100m along the road saying ‘Careful Now!’ instead.
Much more to the point – why not topless girls holding up ’50’ signs every 100m.
It works.
Damnit, even I would drive slowly!