According to Twitter, today is No Smoking Day?
It is in the UK but I'm not sure about Ireland. Actually I am [I just looked it up] – we apparently had ours on February the 10th but I missed it, so I am celebrating it today in support of all my friends across the water.
So what am I going to do to celebrate this momentous occasion? Frankly I'm not sure. I'll just light the pipe and ponder over that little conundrum.
OK. I have decided.
And why would I do nothing to celebrate this great occasion you ask? I am ignoring it in solidarity with all those who don't have their own special day.
For some reason, they like to pick on smoking as if there was something bad about it. Why don't they have a No Farting Day? Why not a No Sport Day? I'm sure there are many around the world who would happily embrace a No Nannying Day? Three cheers for No Flying Day, No Looking Through Windows Day and No Work Day!
When you have a No Whatever Day, doesn't that imply that the other 364 [or 365 this year] days are Go And Do Whatever Days? So whoever dreamed up this brilliant idea of a No Smoking Day must condone every other day being a Smoking Day, otherwise they'd declare every day a No Smoking Day?
Seeing as they actually have declared every other day as No Smoking Day I can only assume that they are running short of funds and have applied for another few hundred grand in order to promote this Day of Days?
When you really think about it, none of it makes any sense.
But then sense seems to be a rare commodity these days