And it came to pass that the Monster came out of his dark and reeking cave and came down to the village and started throwing tins of spam at the villagers.
The villagers cried “Stop. For this is Spam, and we do not want it”.
But the Monster had stolen their addresses and carried on throwing the tins of spam.
And the villagers brought forth the Black Knight, who was also known as Michele who faced up to the Monster. The Black Knight did write large the evil deeds of the Monster who was also called himself John Burns. The monster was not pleased.
A pipsqueak who called himself Pedro Luciani came forth from the Monsters cave and said that the Black Knight knew not what he was talking about and that the Monster was a nice Monster.
The Black Knight told Pedro Luciani to shut up as he was a friend of the Monster, but Pedro Luciani said he knew not the Monster and that the Black Knight was of the lower classes.
The Black Knight laughed for he knew that Pedro Luciani was from the Monsters cave, so he spanked him on the bottom and sent him crying home to his mammy.
But the Monster threw a fit and said that he was not called John Burns.
“What shall we call you then?” cried the Knights.
“Call me by another persons name, but don’t call me John Burns” said John Burns.
The villagers and the Knights all laughed, but this did anger the Monster, and he threatened to bring forth his army of legal people.
“Bring them on!” cried the Black Knight, “for I too have an army of legal people and you have done wrong by stealing the villagers names and throwing spam at them”.
And the Monster skulked back to his cave, for the people were laughing at him.
And that is enough for now children…..
Time for bed.