Another hospital trip under the belt.

I left the house at half seven this morning and arrived at the hospital with just enough time to walk to the unit that does the cancer treatment. I swear it’s a mile of corridors but I may be wrong.

Anyhows, after the obligatory wait myself and the rest of the bunch in the waiting room were shepherded en mass to the treatment room.

The treatment room is strange. It is basically like a long corridor and along one wall there are loads of identical chairs. They are a bit like dentists’ chairs without the dentists as each one has its bunch of electronics and a coat hanger for the drugs. I grabbed a chair and adjusted anything that could be adjusted until I was really comfortable. They duly came to me and stuck a needle in my arm. A bag of something was hung on the cat hanger and they left me to it. I fell asleep.

Just as a word of warning to you all, if ever you are in a treatment room for a serious medical problem, it isn’t advisable to fall asleep. The staff had a bit of a panic and I woke to frantic calls of my name only to find myself surrounded by nurses. They breathed a communal sigh if relief when I apparently did a biblical resurrection from death.

Having emptied one bag of unspecified liquid into my arm, they came at me with another bag. Before hanging this on the hanger they carefully covered it with a green plastic sheath. I asked what that was about and apparently this was the indicator that I was getting Innunotherapy: a purple shroud indicates Chemotherapy. There’s bit of insider information for you.

Anyways I went back to sleep until my green bag was empty.

On the way home I received a phonecall It was an automated message form the European Fraud Office or some-such daft title. There was suspicious activity in my bank account and I was to press 1 immediately to talk to the Irish Fraud Office [?] or else I would be taken into custody within half an hour. Seeing as it probably would take me more than half an hour to get home my chances of arrest were slim. I closed the call.

I just had another call from them. This time it was from Belgium [0032 472 36 821] but had an identical message. I am to be placed into custody forthwith as I didn’t press 1. That was a couple of hours ago so The Irish Fraud Squad are late for my arrest.

I think I’ll have a sleep while waiting for them