I had a visitor yesterday. And that’s putting it mildly.

Megs arrived for a chat. I knew she was on the way as she sent a text. I like that. It gives me a chance to clear up the place a little.

She breezed in the back door. ‘Do you know’, says she, ‘that there are two men doing something to the house?’ Times have become so surreal that I didn’t turn a hair. ”What are they doing?’ I asked. ‘I duuno’ says she,’they’re doing something with your windows’. I relaxed. There were obviously fixing the crap sealing around the new installations which up to now had just been ugly non-waterproof expanding foam.. I had been complaining about that for a while. As we spoke, a bloke strode past the windows heading for Herself’s window. ‘There’s one!’ cried Megs, like she had just spotted a Yeti.

So Megs and I chatted. Or rather Megs chatted and I listened which tends to be the norm with her visits.

My phone rang. It was the bloke who had phoned yesterday who I assumed was of Indian origin, but I decided I was wrong and he was more of an eastern European or even western Russian origin. Leastwise his accent was still so thick the I couldn’t make out what he was saying. After many repetitions I eventually translated that he was lost and trying to find the house. I asked him where he was, and could he see a bus stop and a lane?. I gathered he was in the lane so I told him where the gate was [right in front of him, probably]. To be on the safe side I went out to wave at him but by the time I got out, he was already parked at the gate and just standing there. He asked me to unlock the gate. [?] I lifted the latch with one finger and opened the gate. Ah a latch! he exclaimed. Definitely eastern European or western Russian. He was a big lad, and whats more there were three more of him in the car.

I still hadn’t a fucking clue what these lads wanted but in the flow of explanation, I managed to pick out the words “kitchen” and “garage”. I opened the garage door and showed him the door to the kitchen. His face lit up, Obviously I had struck a chord. I left him examining the garage wall. Whatever makes you happy? I went back to Megs who had been sitting nursing a grand mug of my coffee for which I am justly famous in the neighbourhood.

Megs was in the middle of one of her long speeches when suddenly the racket stated. The lads in the garage were drilling big holes in the wall. Fuck but it was loud! I went to see what they were at and discovered they are dry-lining about six foot of garage wall where it overlaps with the kitchen on the other side. And most of that area is filled with doorway. Crazy! How much heat was I losing through that? I left them to it.

Next, Daughter arrived.but unlike my other visitors, she breezed in and breezed out just as quick.

After everyone had gone I had a look at what had been done. The first lads had done a brilliant job sealing the window frames [though the windows themselves still look fucking ugly.

\the garage now has a new section of wall that looks very strange. They had to remount a couple of power points, the light swich and the heating control panel. They are all in different places so I won’t be able to grope for them in the dark. At least everything still seems to wok.

So that’s it. My insulation grading project id finished?

Unless they thing up something else weird to do?