Are you Purified?
I have been giving this passport lark some thought.
I must have spent at least ten minutes on the subject.
So I can go into a pub and have a pint if I have been jabbed. Or I’m okay if I have had the lurgy and have recovered. If I have had the lurgy and died then I am not eligible for a pint.
But how does the pub know? Well, the nice people in the Health Mob will email me something. This is assuming I have an email account [and a lot of people don’t but they didn’t think of that] and I can the scan something onto my smart phone. But that’s assuming I have a smart phone [and even more people don’t have one but they didn’t think of that].
But supposing I didn’t go to the Health Mob to get my needle? Well, then I must have gone to my local GP. He will send me a letter with something to scan into my smart phone which I may not own. That of course is assuming that a) he has made a record of the fact and b) that he could be arsed to send loads of letters when he hasn’t got the time as he is busy treating people who are actually sick, and not just wanting a pint.
And how do I prove that I have had the lurgy? This is another problem. Assuming I was hospitalised but not dead the I can only assume that they email me to an account which I may not have, to scan into my phone which I’m even less likely to have. If I had the lurgy but it was so mild that I didn’t even bother Doc then how the fuck is anyone supposed to know apart presumably from myself. They haven’t worked that one out yet.
Right. We will assume for the sake of argument that I actually have a smart phone and the little gizmo on it I can go for a pint? Well, I can but I can’t bring my young family. Well, I can if my family are under 18 [a pub with an “Under 18s Only” policy? Wow!] but not if they are a little bit older and haven’t had their prick.
So I arrive at the pub that will only accept the Purified [i.e. those that have had the jab, have an email account and a smart phone]. I then have to have my phone checked by a staff member who is very unlikely to have been Purified and will therefore be spreading the disease everywhere.
Having been checked in, I can finally order my pint. But another trap lies ahead.
I can only stay in the pub for 105 minutes. This is apparently down to some studies that discovered that the Virus is benign for an hour and three quarters but at 106 minutes [precisely] it suddenly mutates into a raving monster that will devour even the Purified. It is a truly amazing Virus?
Who is going to police all this? Well, that’s down to our Gardai who now have the powers to enforce the law. But the law also says they cannot enter the pub [or restaurant or coffee shop]. So they have to rely on Extrasensory Perception. All our police are apparently trained in ESP, or indeed by ESP.
Complicated, isn’t it?
It’s just as well that I don’t have to go through any of this rigmarole. I don’t need their passport thingy.
I have been banned for years because of the smoking hysteria and would have to stay outside anyway.
I wouldn’t want to enter any establishment that didn’t want me.
I’ve been giving this passport thing a thought or two also.
This reeks a bit too much like, “Give me your papers, old man.” Spoken in my best German accent.
In this country a cop can only demand you show an ID. I have used many things as an ID card rather than the expected drivers license.
Now a business can demand you show a vaccination kinda’ paper be it actual paper or digital. You can also choose not to frequent this business. This is where the real power lays. Most business that require either you to wear a mask or have a vac. passport have found their bottom line greatly reduced thus most business’s require neither. Power to the People!
I couldn’t agree more. It is creating a two-tier society of literally the “haves” and “have nots”. And where does it end? Will they insist on viewing the rest of my details [“Sorry sir. No entry to the cake shop as you are deemed obese”]. Are they going to invent new vaccines and limit your access if you don’t comply? In theory they could create a society where only those who take vaccinations can access food, and those vaccinations could contain anything.
Incidentally and just as a small asside, the certs are illegal anyway –
“On 27 January, the Council of Europe signed Resolution 2361, which states that vaccinations in EU Member States should not be mandatory. Furthermore, persons who have not been vaccinated may not be discriminated against in any way.” –
Hate to tell you this but Council of Europe resolutions have no legal force whatsoever. It’s just a talk shop.
Bugger! I was looking forward to the court cases.
Don’t be so quick to discount the dead. After all in the USA they still get to vote in many precincts. Although they always seem to vote for Democrats.
True enough. Our dead tend to vote Fianna Fáil. The latter’s support has dropped drastically of late so maybe the dead are dying?
Yes, and in some counties it seems they get to vote more than once.
Flann O’Brien would have made much of these times.
I have a friend who downloaded a vaccine passport from the interwebs. I think a lot of folk are going to go that way.
Our Lords and Masters have already stated they’ll impose a fine of €2,000 for that!
“Who is going to police all this? Well, that’s down to our Gardai who now have the powers to enforce the law. But the law also says they cannot enter the pub [or restaurant or coffee shop]. So they have to rely on Extrasensory Perception. All our police are apparently trained in ESP, or indeed by ESP.”
Perhaps they could gain some training notes from the Wellington Paranormal task force?
After all, the NZ Police did … ;=})
Surely the paranormal cops could only detect the dead? But then the dead will probably be the main customers anyway.