The postman has just been and gone.
Since they have now closed down my coffee shop, possibly for three months or even permanently, the arrival of a few pieces of junk through the letterbox is now the highlight of my day. The excitement is palpable when I see that DayGlo clad figure on my CCTV.
So I rushed through the house to see what crud he had delivered today and I wasn’t disappointed.
There, lying on the porch floor under the letter box was a beautiful glossy pamphlet – “Public Information” it declared, and under in Bold lettering “National Framework for living with COVID-19″. Wow! A National Framework! It was accompanied by another leaflet trying to sell me log burning stoves, but I don’t think the two were related.
I opened up my National Framework and lo, before me lay a large poster to hang on my wall. It gave all the details of the various Levels they have been spouting about with little pictures of churches and weddings [but not funerals] and little groups of people showing how many can attend a pub or a restaurant or a football match or whatever. I noticed that under Level 3 I can have six visitors to the house but two of them have to be decapitated, which is a bit weird. Having listed all these little icons under the various Levels, it proceeded to list them all again but in Irish. Under Leibhéal 3 I can still have six visitors but they can all keep their heads which is presumably a sly attempt to promote the Irish language?
Sadly I won’t be hanging it on my wall. I am miserable enough with the loss of the coffee shop without having a constant reminder.
I might take a leaf from the other leaflet though.
It will be grand for starting a fire.