Survival of the fattest
So another one has come and gone.
And once again I seem to have survived.
With all this hooha on the run up to Christmas you would imagine that it is some kind of extraordinary day akin to the Apocalypse.
Yet I woke up today to find the world is exactly the same as yesterday and the day before. The trees all look the same, the grass is just as shabby and the fox [White Rhino?] continues to call and drive the dog mad. It is grey out there but pleasantly mild. Herself is still in the attic watching daytime television. I still have the same old aches and pains.
What the blind fuck is all the excitement about?
The only difference that I can see is the fridge is now stocked with stuff that will probably eventually be thrown out. The house is in a bit of a mess, though Daughter did the washing up last night which frankly is one of the best Christmas presents I have ever had. One of the strings of lights on the Christmas tree has died but it can stay that way. Who cares if the tree looks like it had suffered from a dose of the Mange?
I’m back on the Interwebs today, but there I notice a difference – my broadband has suffered. I thought it was a bit slow so I tested it. Fuck! I’m only getting a little over 20Mb! This is Apocalyptic all right.
I would complain but every business is closed for some reason.
The world is going to the dogs.
I’m only getting a little over 20Mb and a foul beast slouches towards the smoking ruins of Ballybumfeck
Don’t panic! Don’t PANIC! Women and children first!
Meh! Even that fun has gone out of the day. It’s back to over 75Mb which is fast enough for
torrentsbrowsing.75Mb which is fast enough for
torrentsbrowsingBack when it was still ‘ok’ to torrent -before we all wised up to the fact that PIRACY is a CRIME and torrenting stuff supports terrorism, Global Warming and Female Genital Mutilation- we used to get excited by download speeds of 200 KB/S…..
I didn’t know that Christmas was supposed to change the world… or was it? Things get kind of fuzzy after two thousand and 18 years or so. All our Christmas tree lights are still lit and the decorations are still where they’re supposed to be despite the cats–amazingly enough. The internet did go out yesterday but that was only because I accidentally pulled the power plug on the modem/wireless router instead of my desk lamp. The Wife complained rather loudly about this so I plugged the stupid thing in again and all was well.
“so I plugged the stupid thing in again and all was well“. That’s not really a nice thing to call your wife? Nor is it a nice thing to do to her? Mind you, I know the temptations……….