Piss off Deirdre
Here we go again.
Storm Deirdre!
Status Orange!
It’s raining. But it’s the middle of December and rain is hardly a big surprise. Yes, it’s a fucking horrible day out there [and I have to go out in it yet] but there is no need to get anyone’s knickers in a twist.
It’s windy. Again, so what? I repeat – December. What do they want me to do about it? Am I supposed to stay all my trees in case they blow over? Am I supposed to take to the bunker? If trees are going to blow down then blow down they shall. There is fuck all I can do about it as I don’t know which trees will fall and all I can do is wait until the wind dies down to examine the damage. Basically, all “Status Orange” means is batten down your garden trampolines.
Anyway, I suppose I had better go out for the paper. I shall of course take precautions such as putting on a cap and coat, but I use my own intelligence to work out what to wear and not some breathless “Status”. I have seen wind and rain before and doubtless will see both in equally copious quantities again in the future. There again, I suppose the modern Snowflakes need someone to tell them what to wear in case they should venture out?
Incidentally – a little footnote.
There was a dead mouse beautifully laid out on the floor outside my bedroom door this morning.
Cat must have read my little brainfart yesterday.
Is she trying to prove her worth, or just apologising?
Cats don’t apologise, but you must know that. Simply seeking approval for her new kill and ensuring she is fed on time to make up for the (presumably) no longer there lunch she saved.
What is happening to our society when we must told to look out for bad weather in December? Remember driving in winter in the 1960’s. No “Warnings”, no dreadful messages about getting stuck in perfectly ordinary conditions, just get on with it and carry a shovel and heavy waterproof jacket. Still do, even though Global whatsit makes real weather more unlikelyl
It really does amaze me how any of us, or indeed the entire human race, survived for all these years without any help from anyone?
Wot? you mean put on a coat, have a wooly hat handy in case it’s cold enough to freeze yer lug ‘oles off, if you have a car it has a brolly inside and another spare coat on the back seat, and a torch and a few odd spanners pliers screwdrivers and cable ties in together with the jack and wheelbrace (and you’ve already checked you can undo those wheelbolts), and a real spare wheel not a pot of goo and pointless toy pump.
A bit of dib dib dib thinking, as in be prepared, seems a lifetime ago.
Just an old rain jacket and a cap. Mind you – discovered a tyre was flattish so I had to foot-pump it in the middle of a large puddle. I have probably filled the tyre with water. Hydrolastic suspension!
It has been the grimmest, darkest, wettest Saturday I can remember for a long time. And we aren’t even catching the worst of it here!
Don’t worry. Tomorrow will be fine[r]. Then comes the first half of next week when the shit really hits the fan!
I’ve consulted with my triumvirate of furry bastards and the consensus is that cat is worried about the fact that you don’t hunt. It’s just decided that you’re a really crap cat and need a few pointers…
But I do hunt. I hunt cats. She should know that by now.
That’s no apology, it’s the cat equivalent of a horse head in your bed!
Damn! Now I have to find something suitable to leave in her basket…………
How about a cucumber? Supposedly a cucumber has the ability to drive certain cats out of their minds. Worth a shot?
I have heard of cucumbers being used for some strange purposes, but that’s a new one on me!
See for yourself:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXv44YL_Gio
At least the mouse was dead, my cats present me with live ones I have to try and catch and once he brought in a baby rat from somewhere and was quite indignant that I wasn’t pleased! Took me hours to find and release it in the garden.
And at least it hadn’t been eaten. The previous [and only other] offering was such a disgusting mess that I could only identify it by its tail.
Would you mind sending a few of those windy, rainy December days over to my area? I’ll take a few January, February,and March days as well if you get them. It would certainly be better than shoveling snow.
You’re more than welcome to what we have at the moment – yet more strong winds and more rain, though it is strangely mild [shortly to drop by several degrees though]. I believe we even have a colour warning of some kind in force, though I don’t know which colour.