“Hiya God!”

“Well, hello Grandad.  It’s been a while?”

“Indeed.  I have been busy.  Listen, I have a couple of questions you may be able to answer?”

“Fire ahead.  Being omnipotent, there is a fair chance I can help.”

“I was just wondering.  You know how you made water an essential commodity for human and most animal life?”

“Yes.  I remember that.”

“Well why did you then cover four fifths of the planet with water that is undrinkable?”

“Ah yes.  Sorry about that.  I was having a bad epoch that particular epoch.  Too much salt I believe?”

“You could say that.  It was a particularly nasty sadistic streak.”

“Get over it.  Have you humans no sense of humour?  What’s the other question?”

“That yoke that’s floating around in space?  Do you know anything about it?

“Oh.  [*cough*]  Yes.  I was having a bit of bowel trouble but that Skjhuu Curry [from the Eighth Quadrant] finally shifted it.  A lovely curry and a great one if you ever have a drop of constipation.”

“So it’s a fucking turd?”

“Even Gods have to shit sometimes.

We’re only human.

Oh, hang on…….”