Our minister needs to drown some women

Is there any aspect of our lives where we can be trusted to look after ourselves?

The latest bit of Nannying comes from our own dear Minister for Transport who is worrying himself into an early grave over the number of boating fatalities here in Ireland.

According to the Irish Times, between 2002 and 2013 there were 2013 fatalities.  This struck me as being a remarkable numerical coincidence, but I laid that to one side and carried on.

Now assuming the 2013 figure is correct, that represents around 168 a year which on the grand scale of things isn't too bad, considering the number of suicides [well into the hundreds] and the millions who die horribly every year from second hand smoke?  Let's see how the numbers break down – 67 related to recreational craft, 53 to fishing vessels, 11 to passenger vessels and six to cargo ships.  Now to my addled senile old brain, that adds up to 137?  So I can only assume the 2013 figure is too coincidental, and is in fact a shite bit of writing and proofreading on the part of the Times.

So looking at our new figure we now have an annual death rate of around 11 a year.  Out of a population of around four million [though I grant not all of us are regular seafarers] that is a pretty negligible figure?

Not so for our Nannying Minister.  Of course he wants further regulations, further education and further enforcement.

What this idiot isn't seeing is that the figures speak for themselves.  67 related to recreational craft?  The majority of those craft are owned by sailing or motor boat enthusiasts who are only too well aware of the dangers of the sea.  If they want to take risks, then that is entirely up to them.  53 related to fishing vessels?  If I wanted an expert on the dangers of the sea I would ask a fisherman.  They know all the dangers and a lot more besides.  They go to sea for a living for fuck's sake.  They do not take risks and do not need to be Nannied by some cunt of a minister.

He is also intensely worried that 99% of all deaths are male.  What the fuck has that got to do with anything?  Maybe he'd like to drown nine women a year to make up the figures?  He must be spitting feathers that there is no mention of cheeeeeldren.

Of course he uses the old catchphrase that these are "avoidable deaths".  Of course they are.  If no one went to sea there would be no drownings.  There would also be no fish in the shops, no ferries, no boating tourism, and all would be sailors could take up Sudoku instead.

Maybe we should all sit at home, never moving outside in case we get run over or trip over something?  We couldn't have heating or cooking [danger of boiler explosions, electrocution or gassing]?  No light [lighting involves electricity or, God forbid, a flame]?  We could just sit there staring at a blank wall for the rest of our [interminable] lives in the secure knowledge that we are "avoiding" death.

The sooner these fuckwits get their heads around the simple fact that people are going to die from reasons other than old age, the sooner the world will be a happier place.

It's only fair to share...Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on RedditShare on StumbleUponShare on Tumblr

Comments

Our minister needs to drown some women — 9 Comments

  1. This is the sort of thing the voters create talking suits…one day enough will wise up and realise the best person to look after their mind and body is themselves. Until then sit back and enjoy the madness.

    • I can only think of two reasons why a so called minister would come up with crap like this.  He's either trying to justify his miserable existence or else he's trying to divert attention from the upcoming bus strike which has made him somewhat unpopular.  It couldn't possibly be the latter, could it?
       

  2. I see around half the deaths are on fishing vessels, and a group here has been monitoring submarine activity in Irish Sea for around 30 years – proved beyond doubt some such deaths were linked, reasonable suspicion in a number of others.

    Check yesterday's news on the Irish fishing vessel dragged backwards at about 10 knots close to Calf of Man for more on this topic.

    Well, your esteemed Minister can advise the captains of Russian nuclear subs until he's blue in the face, but I doubt they'll review their health and safety protocol.

     

     

    • Well how does any fisherman know the nationality of any submarine that is pulling his fishing boat backwards…they never surface, introduce themselves and apologise for nearly dragging them under.

      • The Brits would never do such a thing as tangle with a fishing net – not cricket.  And if it's not the Brits [or the Yanks] it has to be the durty Russkies.

        • Having once worked with the chaps who drive the British subs I can tell you they don't play cricket and what about the French and the Indians…they have nuclear subs. The only sure thing is it wasn't an Irish or a Manx submarine. These folks have no need od such pointless machines.

          One notable collision was between two nuclear subs one French and one British boggles the mind to try and work out how such things got close enough to hit each other without either knowing the other was there.

        • It would never be a U.S. submarine.  The only things we do is surface in the path of Japanese fishing boats full of students.

  3. Coming back to the original question – if a Minister here started raising those sort of concerns, we'd wonder if he had shares in a company that makes life-belts or safety flares….and even after it turned out he had we'd find couldn't get  rid of the chancer!

  4. Has the ESRI got any statistics on the ratio between summer chocolate ice cream sales and deaths of children and adults who accidentally slip and break their necks after falling on discarded melting ice chocs? Is the government going to draft new comprehensive regulations aimed at reducing fatalities of this kind? Here's wishing you all a sunny, ice creamy summer. And look before you slip.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *