The Black Crow — 37 Comments

    • Some people call him the Black Dog, but I have more respect for dogs than that.

      If you don't know what I am on about, then count yourself lucky!


  1. How SAD is that?  Get yourself a sunlamp and bask in the revitalising rays.  Or buy better whiskey.

    • I'd prefer the real thing.  I could fancy myself sitting on a sunny beach under the palm trees right now.  A couple of weeks months equatorial would be nice……

    • The little bugger likes whiskey.  He pretends he doesn't and stays quiet while I'm supping but he's twice as black and twice as heavy the following day.

  2. Even the crap is given to us for a reason, GD (or, if you prefer, we unconsciously invite crap into our lives). How we deal with it says a a fair bit about where we are in the grand scheme of things and is more important than the misery it occasions; I was fortunate enough long ago to be given a bit of guidance by an old lady who laughingly admitted that she would have been burnt as a witch centuries earlier and she told me to "look sideways". If you are being obstructed, don't peer anxiously ahead trying to see past the obstacle – look around you, something there needs your attention and this is Life's way of drawing your attention to it. When I witness more fuckwittery from the great and good, it is time to look sideways .. Hello Dogbloke, didn't see you there, is it a walk yez a-wantin'? … my life empties (slowly) of crap to replaced by good stuff.

    It may be that the crow is a friend in disguise …

    It may also be that I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about and should shut up and bugger off 🙂

    • One of the best antidotes around here is Penny [Dogbloke?].  I swear that dog would make the devil himself laugh out loud with her idiotic antics.  I completely agree that the best tack is to concentrate on the present, or sideways as you put it.  Never look back or forward – there is more than enough sustenance for the Crow there.

      • I nicked Dogbloke courtesy of Call Me Ishmael; when his wife asked about female dogs he said Ladydogblokes, obviously …..

  3. At the winter solstice the days switch from shortening to lengthening. As I have aged the time it takes the change to become noticeable appears to have shortened. Perhaps as we age the race to the end speeds up.

    With genuine Love & Affection 
    The Black Crow

    Change the channel I hate this Strictly come dancing shit!


    • Now there is a very cheering thought – I am not watching "Strictly Come Dancing".  Nor far that matter am I watching "The X-Factor" nor "I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here".  Very often the things I'm not doing are the ones that cheer me up.

  4. Nil desperandum GD.Keep taking the medication prescribed by your trusted  off-licence owner(just double the dosage) and all will be ok in January.

  5. 'Without Fall, there couldn't be Spring'. Ok, that's my Chauncey Gardiner type moment for 2013, promise! 🙂

    They say it's best to know your enemy, so here's a couple of 'handy' links:

    Crows are smart bastards!

    How to get rid of the feckers! (Skip step 3, chopping off your shoulder sounds a bit extreme!)

    Failing all that, mucho brisk walks with Penny, laugh at life, and maybe a cat addition to the family? 


    • Thanks for those, Mick.  Much appreciated.  I tried the trick of festooning myself with old CDs and playing loud music out the windows.  Worked a treat.

      Any tips on pacifying neighbours?

    • I admired the illustrator's graphic skills in the link about how to get rid of irritating crows; but the advice to contact the Audoban Society gave the game away why the site doesn't list an obvious point #7 – shoot the varmints with a blast of rifle pellets. There are birds and there are birds in God's wonderful nature. Only bird conservationists would go gaga over the preservation of crows.

  6. Horrible stuff. I have started playing Bruce Springsteen's 'Further On Up the Road' during the blackness. It says, 'I'm going through a crap time but will get through it and will see you up ahead'.

    • OK, now.  The bugger has buggered off for the moment.  The restorative powers of a really good night's sleep!

  7. I know how you feel, I get bouts of it too and it is almost impossible to explain to anyone who has never suffered. I have learned just to wait it out, it does pass eventually. Good luck and hope it doesn't last long.

    • Accept it for what it is and even though it's hard to believe at the time, it does pass.  Leastwise my Old Crow has buggered off for the time being. 

  8. I found it's to do with lack of light. Now I have a 250 watt SON lamp on a stick in my bedroom, plugged in to a time clock. At 0700 it comes on with a small click and a tiny blueish light. Over a few minutes the light gets bigger and more orange, then VERY VERY BIG and VERY BRIGHT AND ORANGE. A bit like having your own sunrise on a cloudless day. Impossible to stand near it and look without grinning. Works for me anyway 🙂

    Failing that, cook the rook in a pie with a bit of bacon, beer and mushrooms. A full belly always makes a body feel better.

    • Sounds good, but I might get a bit narked at being woken at seven every day.  I presume if it's on a timer I could set it to a more reasonable time?  Like 1pm?

  9. Picture yourself near a stream. The birds are singing in the crisp mountain air. Nothing can bother you here because no one knows your secret place. You are in total seclusion from this place called The World. All you can hear is the soothing sound of the waterfall filling the air with a cascade of serenity. The water is quite clear and you can see Black because his head is just under the water. You are holding him under the water, but you allow him up…just for a quick breath, then back under he goes; and there he stays…and you can take as many breaths as you want. Feeling better? 

    • Nice one, Bernard!  I know just the spot [a bit up the valley from here].  In future I'll retreat there, in mind if not in body, and drown the little fucker.

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