The third switch — 27 Comments

  1. It seems to be a 'man-thing' never to read instructions. 

    After 48 years, and numerous only partly assembled flat-packs, Himself has only recently discovered it pays.

    Of course HE doesn't read them but he graciously lets me do it and 'suggest' to him what to do next.

    As a mere woman I discovered the "Fast-Freeze" switch at least 25 years ago!!

    • "As a mere woman I discovered the "Fast-Freeze" switch at least 25 years ago!!"  Well why the hell didn't you tell me about it then?! 

  2. ROFL!  It was many moons ago with a brand new microwave oven with way too many buttons that I learned to R.T.F.M. 🙂

  3. Read a manual?     Who the hell came up with the name "manual" for the cursed  things anyway?  There's nothing manual about them.  I have one them written in seven different languages.  Talk  about a fucking waste of paper.  My favorite are the ones from Ikea with stick figures kicking the shit out of contraption from the devil.   GD, you yanked my chain on this one.

  4. Did you get in and press the third button? Go on give it a go. Tell us if the light goes out when you shut the door too.

    • Tried that.  Ended up in 2577.  Do NOT wish to repeat the experiment. 

      P.S. They laughed themselves sick when I said that some people actually believed in Manmade Climate Change back in 2012.

  5. Ah yes, manuals. I have a sometimes (to me) surprising situation here in Greece, in that appliances I buy very often come with multilingual manuals. Now you would think that English being the generally accepted universal language, that there would always be an English version.




    I have manuals in more than a dozen languages, none of them English. WTF? It's fortunate that I can read Greek, otherwise I'd be fucked.


    Mostly, though, manuals tend to be an afterthought for me. I use them if I can't work out why the item is malfunctioning, despite my inspired efforts.

    • Everyone knows that manuals are for women, or for men as a last resort.

      Bout  a yoke a couple of days ago.  Plugged it in and all was fine.

      Later in a fit of boredom, unpacked the manual and read the installation instructions.

      Important installation instructions [should take five to ten minutes] –

      1. Connect power cable  to back of unit.

      2. Plug power unit into mains supply.

      3. Switch on.

      What I want to know is how I managed it in ten seconds.  What did I miss???

  6. Actually my best ever instruction sheet was packed with a large piece of computer equipment (HP I think). Having struggled to remove the equipment from the cardboard box I found a piece of paper under it warning that unpacking required two people and instructing how to hold it to lift the thing out.

  7. My house has a third switch. It's in the living room and lives by the front door along with two other switches. The first switch turns on the overhead light, the second turns on the outside lights but the third…turns on…nothing. Since the neighbors haven't been looking at my house with an amused look on their faces every time I fiddle with the damn thing (they only do that when they look at me when I'm outside in the yard) I'm at a complete loss as to what it's for.

    Considering my house didn't come with a manual I guess I'll never know. Perhaps I should ask my wife?

    • You'll probably find there is some poor fuck in Nebraska, or somewhere who is wondering why his power keeps going off and on?

  8. Haha, very funny. You will probably notice a decrease in the electricity bill.

    I generally follow the RTFM rule for most things, with the main exception being for items bought from IKEA. We rarely buy from IKEA but I have been asked numerous times by friends for help with the installation of their IKEA purchases. When I get there, they have generally over-rided their pathways by reading the garbage that IKEA claims are installation manuals. I just examine the pieces and work it out myself.

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