Getting Your Goat
I have been memed yet again.
When will these people ever learn?
Appropriately it’s called Getting Your Goat. It was started by Kieron over at Keiron’s Window to Madness
The rules are simple enough:
- List two things that irritate you for a reason (and list the reason!), and two things that irritate you for no apparent reason whatsoever!!
- Give credit to the person who tagged you.
- Link your answers to the original blog, that’s here (http://www.skillett.com)!
- Tag four new people to participate.
OK. As memes go, this isn’t too bad. It isn’t a fluffy ‘things you don’t know about me’ or ‘my top five operettas’ or anything like that. It’s a grumpy meme. There should be more of those.
1. Two things [only two?] that irritate me and why:
Umbrellas. This is easy! I hate the fecking things. People who use them wave them around like some kind of demented sword as if they were warding off attackers. I am over six feet tall, and so my eye level is at roughly the same level as an umbrella. I am sick of being whacked in the face by the things. The next person to poke me with one will discover how it feels to walk with an umbrella inserted up their rectum.
Spam. Who doesn’t hate spam? It’s boring repetitive and unimaginative. I don’t want any viagara thanks. Why do I need a replica watch [I prefer to have one that works]? What is the point in having a fake degree? If you are going to send spam, at least make it interesting or funny. Learn to fucking spell, for God’s sake.
Two things that irritate me and I don’t know why:
Victoria Beckham. An anorexic talentless tart. I hate the sight of her, and her sour puss appears everywhere. Thank God the Americans were dumb enough to take her away.
Sponsored television programmes. Those irritating little ads that have to appear before and after the programme, and before and after every commercial break. They’re like a nail on glass.
That is it. It took a while to pare down the hundreds to just two, but I managed.
2. Now I have to give credit to Kieron. Why? One irritation I left out was memes. But I’ll forgive him [this once] as long as he doesn’t do it again.
3. I already have.
4. Fuck. I hate this bit. B’dum B’dum, K8 the GR8, English Mum and Andrew. Heh!
As I said – normally I avoid that sort of thing like the plague too! Too much “I like blue flowers, the smell of rain – and of course, acrobatic midgets” for my liking.
But it’s the irrational one’s that intrigued me about this, some inbuilt switch that
puts you off something, that you (and nobody else for that matter!) understand.
I’ll forgive you just this once. I liked it though. It appealed to the dark side of my nature [is there another side?].
There shouldn’t be!
Now the entertaining challenge for someone, can we get Victoria Beckham to poke Grandad with an Umbrella – that would at least solve one of your irritations!
Hmmmm. Victoria Beckham with an umbrella sticking out her arse? That conjures up quite a nice picture?
Good Grief! That’s all I need… two of you with that evil sense of humour! Oh well must dash – I’ve got a meme to do…….
Kate – You mean you hadn’t realised until now?
You ain’t seen nothing until he really gets started – I’m sure he was swapped in the hospital
Damn you, Grandpere, and your evil memes.
I’m not commenting
Kate – They all say that.
E Mum – Heh! I’m feeling better already. 😈
Kerryview – Who didn’t say that?
I’m really feeling old. grandad, wtf is a meme. thought I had the old farts network sorted. obviously not
as for Victoria Beckham, we will get even.
Kerryview – A meme is a horrible thing where someone picks on you and challenges you to write about something. It is usually something woeful like “tell us eight things about yourself that you have never mentioned before”. You then have to pick on other poor suckers who have to do the same thing. Like a chain letter, only worse.
Jim – You have her; you keep her. Hahaha!!
I was gonna tag you back. So you’d have to do it again.
so now I can impress the lads in the pub – instead of hoppin the ball I can start a meme. thnx grandad
BB- Just try.
Kerryview – Don’t tell me the lads in the pub know you’re at this game? Bloody hell! Have you no pride?
What’s an umbrella?
oh Grandad – you know the score! jesus, me bloggin? lads in pub know sweet fa about it! holy god I’d never live it down – they’d have me down as bein in chat rooms and virtual women and all such things. of course I’m pretty sure one or two of them actually do do that. and paddypower betting of course. On second thought I’ll stick with hoppin balls.
Baino – A little thing you put in a cocktail. Of all people, you should know that! *sigh*
Kerryview – Very wise.
With You on umbrellas Grandad. I hate the things.
I don’t know – quite keen on umbrellas having got married in the midst of the Great Floods of Gloucester last year!!
Now if ever there was a day for umbrellas that was it!
Thanks, Grandad. I tried this, and I wasn’t even tagged. Perhaps being irritated by things is a fact of life.
Umbrellas are evil nasty spawn of hell. I have far too often been smacked by an escaping umbrella and had my eyes gouged out.
I’ll stick with being rained upon and wet and soggy any day!
Lottie – I know what I would do with them all [and their owners] but if I gave details, I’d have to remove this site…..
Keiron – Umbrellas are feck all use in a flood. They don’t float very well and you can get more people into a boat. You’ll have to do it all over again.
Brought to you by Big Ol Corp. Having trouble getting up your umbrella? try Viabrella. Order a 30 day supply for only 4 times the price of a week supply. Hurry quantities are limited. Brought to you by Big Ol Corp.
Told you we would get even.
You can’t wave a boat at a rescue helicopter mind!
Marlys – Are you a masochist or what? Voluntarily doing memes? Weird!
Jim C – Useless! If that is supposed to be spam, then you’ll have to brush down on your spelling and grammar. Try again.
Keiron – Why not? Anyway, once you are married, it’s too late for rescue…
God I hate Baino so much right now (just come back from a walking in the pissing rain. AGAIN) x
Are these things the new-fangled version of chain letters?
Ah feck you Grandad, just cos I implied you were a big girl’s blouse in the comments yesterday.
*scuttles off all secretly thrilled because no-one has ever memed him before*
It seems like every 1960’s movie or TV show has umbrellas in it. Even retro movies. Usually being carried by secret agents such as John Steed or Dangerman, psychopaths in Clockwork Orange or a “mod” girl carrying a clear one. I don’t know, I guess nostalgia lends me a certain fondness for them. Wasn’t there (in reality) some Bulgarian secret agent who killed some diplomat with a poisoned tip umbrella.
E Mum – Ignore Baino [I do]… She only does it to try to annoy us. 😉
TheChrisD – That is about the level of it. But if you ignore it, you burn in virtual hell.
Andrew – Never memed before?? Hmmmm. *scribbles name in notebook to receive next 500 memes*
TT – Zapping spies is une use for them, I suppose. At least they are rolled up at the time and unlikely to take my eyes out.