All I want for Christmas……. — 2 Comments

  1. That shopping trip could have been made a lot easier if you had rubbed butter in your hair, spilt yellow liquid down your top and rubbed your armpits with parmesan. Also some well placed facial mucous contributes a lot. People tend to evacuate a queue pretty quickly when they come across you. Works for me, anyway.

    I think people are over stocking because of those pain in the arse relatives that ask for strange and wonderful things to eat and/or wipe their bums with. Also if Santa should (santa forbid) crash his sleigh into a nuclear power plant, at least one has plenty of canned goods to survive on.

    Anyway you’re sussed because you have 14 cow’s worth of milk in your fridge. Ha ha!

  2. I did break wind quite a lot to see if that would help, but there was a poor old lady in the queue in front of me, and she got the blame. I felt a bit sorry for her, so I stopped.

    And I do not have 14 cow’s worth of milk in my fridge. I don’t know where you got that idea from. I have enough until the next shopping trip. I do have a cow in there, but that’s another story.

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