We are doomed
I think I’m prepared.
My phone is fully charged, my backup power source is bursting at the seams with excited electrons and I have filled my oil lamps. Wherever you look in the Manor you’ll see all the candles I have set up.
I have yet to set up the camping stove with its brand new bottle of gas but that’s next on my list of emergency measures.
You see, the entire country is under a RED WARNING with the imminent arrival of Storm Éowyn.
This is serious shit. A red warning means there is potential for flying debris presenting a danger to life, very dangerous driving conditions, power outages and damage to buildings and homes. I am to stay huddled up under a blanket until the storm has passed. Under no circumstances must I venture outside or even open a window, I am currently glued to the radio as they issue constant updates on the progress of the storm.
They say this is to be the worst storm we have ever experienced. Worse even than Hurricane Charlie back in ’86? Wow! I am crapping myself. The worst storm since records began back in 4,760 BC.
Herself is worried about our trees. She has a point. But there is fuck all I can do about it. The last wind we had blew down a tree and I never would have guessed that that tree would be the first to go. It was a smallish one that looked grand and solid and healthy. Random. My trees are in the lap of the gods.
I wish they had never started with this lark of naming storms and giving them colours. Storms were never as dangerous before.
There is little more I can do.
If this site goes silent after today, you’ll know that Éowyn got me.
Overheard in a shop today… “There’s no end of warnings recently.”
Perhaps it is part of a mad scheme to make us take the Climate Change scam seriously? Have they not read the fable about the Boy Who Cried Wolf?
Soon we will be advised to purchase special specs in order read these weather scary pictures.
Wind, temperature, flooding, rain, drought, ice, snow, pollen, bullshit, – all are slipping off the ends of the visible spectrum.
Breaking news. All shops are issuing a red availability warning on infra-red specs, ultra-violet specs and bumf. No I really do mean toilet paper.
For some reason we always panic buy toilet paper.
We are still waiting for reports from brown trouser retailers.
Possibly you should consider a name change from headrambles to headshambles!
“I am to stay huddled up under a blanket”… No, that’s for bogymen.
You huddle under the stairs for air raids, under a table for nuclear attack. Red weather events, down the nuclear fallout shelter.
If you don’t have a shelter, ‘HBNAKAG’ Head Between your Knees, Kiss your Ass Goodbye!