Evil, degrading, addictive, harmful

A public health crisis.

So another "public health crisis" is rearing its ugly head, to add to the long list of tobacco, fat, sugar, alcohol and all the rest?

So what exactly is this new "crisis"?

Yes, folks, it's PORN.

I am familiar with pornography.  Who isn't these days?  I ignore it because the sight of a couple grinding and groaning on a small screen doesn't interest me, just as watching a cookery programme doesn't satiate my hunger or satisfy my taste buds.  It's easy enough to avoid – just don't go looking for it.

Many many years ago, I was in London with a few friends.  This was before the Interweb age  and one of the group was desperate to see a porn film.  So we headed over to Soho, found a cinema and went in.  There were two films on show [I mercifully can’t remember their names] and we walked out after about ten minutes [much to the enthusiast’s disgust] because the film was intensely tedious and boring.  There is only so much grinding, groaning and sweat that a man can take.

Apparently however, pornography is “a public health hazard” that can result in wide-ranging harm to individuals and society at large".

Now this conjures up some rather disturbing images in my mind.  Are people whacking off at the side of the road in the state of Utah?  Are they discarding their used tissues and old socks in the gutters?  If not, then how is it a public health issue?  How is it harming society at large?

What about the cheeeldren I hear them cry?  What about them?  Kids will look for porn because they are curious.  Internet porn is just the modern equivalent of underwear brochures and Health & Efficiency Magazine.  They will watch and snigger and then move on to something else.  It saves a lot on the old Birds and Bees lectures?

I have a theory.  It's only a theory mind, but nevertheless it's mine.  My theory is that those who decry pornography the most are those who are hooked on the stuff and are desperate to have it removed at any cost.  Their wrists are shot from Repetitive Strain Injury, the carpet of their computer room is stiff and caked, and they just want to stop.  They suffer major pangs of guilt and the only way to purge their secret passion is to publicly denounce the practice.

So next time Todd Weiler is out and about, just watch closely.

Does he walk like John Wayne? 

Does his breathing rate increase at the sight of a woman?

Does he disappear into the gents' toilet every ten minutes and come out sweating?

Does he always carry a box of tissues?

Is his wrist inflamed and painful?

I wonder…..