I found a report today.
There seems to be an alarming number of “researchers” out there because rarely a day passes without some new report being published to scare the shite out of us? I didn’t realise just how many are concerned about my health. At this stage just about everything I do, eat, drink or even see is going to give me cancer.
So this latest one reckons I should have no more than one sugary drink a week. A week, not a day. The image implies Coca-Cola which seems to be the standard target of all these studies but sugary drink covers a lot more.
I like my tea. I have a pint mug which I refill at intervals during the day. I tend to suffer from a dry mouth so a drink of something is nearly always to hand otherwise my mouth gums up and I can’t speak properly.. I suppose I have about four or six pints of tea a day, and I suppose it’s only a matter of time before they’ll announce that a teaspoon of tea a week causes cancer.
I like my tea fairly strong and I like it with a drop of sugar. I shove a couple of teaspoons of the white stuff into each mug. I assume this means it falls into the category of a “sugary drink”.
The report suggests [“suggests” being a favourite word in these reports] that each mugful is doing me irreparable harm and is going to cause a very nasty death from cancer of every organ and total heart failure.
The authors found “significant harmful associations” between dietary sugar consumption and diabetes, gout, obesity, high blood pressure, heart attacks, strokes, asthma, tooth decay, depression, premature death and some cancers – including breast, prostate and pancreatic cancer.
I’m surprised they haven’t included Halitosis and Frostbite.
And each additional sugar-sweetened drink per day was linked to a 17% higher risk of coronary heart disease and a 4% higher risk of death during a study follow-up period of the studies reviewed.
Right. Each and every mug of tea increases my chances of a nasty death. So at four [or six] mugs increases my risk of a heart attack by 68% [or 102%] But that’s per day. Every week my risk increases to 476% [or 714%] I don’t dare work out my annual risk.
I’m quite shaken by that. I must have died months or years ago.
I need a fresh mug of tea to calm my nerves.
The way I look at it is.
If you have been in the habit of doing something which increases the probability of death, and you then take up something else which increases the probability of death, then the probability of you shuffling off because of the first habit is reduced.
This is a good thing.
Of course the probability of death never changes, it’s always 100%, the only variable is in its timing – whether any particular activity impacts on that timing is the issue. However, we must also consider the quality of life ahead of that absolutely certain event – we may indeed be able to delay it, but usually only at a cost of eliminating aspects of pleasure during that time.
As my wise old dad advised, if you don’t drink, don’t smoke and don’t go with mucky women, you won’t live any longer, but it will just feel like it. He died a happy man at 86.
So basically the chances of my death are 100%. But partaking of sugary drinks increases the risk to 100%. However by giving up my pipe would decrease the risk to 100%. I think I’ll stick with the tea and pipe. It’s easier on the maths.
Kingsly Amis once said that he liked a few pints, and giving them up just so the he could live for two more years in a nursing home in Weston Super Mare just wasn’t going to happen…
Theoretically I can increase my lifespan by quitting a few of my pleasures, but what’s the point if I then have to live without my pleasures? Increasing lifespan isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
Hot tea is on THE LIST: https://www.numberwatch.co.uk/cancer%20list.htm 🙂
The list of things caused by global warming is even longer (and it hasn’t been updated for several years): https://www.numberwatch.co.uk/warmlist.htm
Wow! I’m impressed, especially by the global warming thing. No more outdoor hockey? The end of the Olympics? We must save the planet immediately!
That list of “significant harmful associations” looks a lot like the possible side effects of every medication I’m required to take per day–except for possible hair loss and purple tongue.