I see Coca Cola are coming into the firing line.

They are running a campaign where names are printed on bottles, and the idea is that you can pick out your own "personalised" bottle.

From what I can gather however, the Royal College of Physicians of Ireland are under the impression that only people under 12 years of age have names.

“yet almost all of the 100 most popular names of seven to eight-year-olds are included in their campaign”

Now I wasn't aware of this strange phenomenon where a new batch of names are introduced each year.  I know that there are a few freaky parents who name their child "Bluemoon Sundance" or "Manhattan Subway" but in general I thought people are still using the old reliables such as "Tom" and Mary" and "John"?  The RCPI seem to think however that the names that Coca Cola have chosen are those that were exclusively issued at birth eight or nine years ago.

And what exactly is the problem anyway?  Is the RCPI scared that kids are going to go out and buy [and drink] over a thousand bottles until they get the right name?  What's far more likely is that the kid would be thrown out of the shop for demanding that the shopkeeper sorts through all thousand bottles to find the right one.

Isn't it strange that suddenly all advertising is "aimed at children"?  A cigarette company changes the font on a pack of cigarettes and it is obviously "aimed at children"?  A picture of an old man supping a glass of whiskey is "aimed at children"?  If it's an advertisement and the Righteous don't approve then it's obviously "aimed at children".

If these self-righteous priggish killjoys are so fucking worried about the cheeeeldren, why don't they just ban them instead?  A worldwide ban on all children under the age of eighteen?  No more worries about badly targeted advertising?  No more obese children?  No more underage smokers?

That could work.