Retrospection and prediction
This is traditionally the time of year when we either look back at the year past or make optimistic predictions for the next year.
I couldn’t be arsed.
Last year in summary? Fucking dire!
Next year? See last year.
I would be a lot happier if I thought we could see the end of the EU. I don’t care at this stage what the alternatives are – they couldn’t be worse than being dominated by the current self-serving, money-grubbing shitbags that seem to think that life should be regulated every second of the day.
I would be a lot happier if I thought that there could be a revolution here where the ordinary people of Ireland finally get to control what goes on. I can’t see that happening though. The Irish have become too cowed and beaten. They have lost the will to live.
I would be a lot happier if I could see the odd politician or banker swaying in the breeze from a lamppost.
I would be a lot happier if I could find a more reliable supplier of smuggled pipe tobacco.
Fuck!
I’m sorry I started this now.
I think I’ll cheer myself up by cleaning the rifles.
Yeah but if we hang the politicians and bankers who will be the ‘wealth creators’ then? I mean, next thing you know people will start to consider houses as places to live and not things you trade in order to become wealthy on paper. Until someone sets fire to the paper. You are right though Groandad- a thousand years of colonisation by external forces does have an effect. My estimate will be that we will have a long overdue revolution when the mammies take the lead off and stop worrying what the neighbours will think if Mick and Joe are seen at a protest on the street. The major problem with the only rebellion in Ireland which came near succeeding (1916) was that not enough of the establishment was swept away face down into a ditch and not enough property was taken by the new state. The top tiers of the civil service (those who took bribes from Charlie McCreevy between 2002 and 2008 to look the other way) should be removed and interned, if you want to be merciful, and shot if like me, you don’t particularly want to pay to keep them. There are no consequences in law for treason in Ireland even though we have an ‘Offences Against The State’ Act. Ponder that…
Yesterday’s post- not sure about. Grown men getting their spunk off by paddling their teenage daughters on the bum. Well, on second thoughts…..
Today -My advice. Get your vacation to La Belle France booked. Something to look forward to and dare I say it to you-something to be happy about. This time check out Aude/ Langued’oc. Narbonne, Bezier, Carcasonne. Pleasant there in the spring.
Don’t mind the EU, stay closer to home. Look at the new penalty points coming on line?
The arseholes should be more honest;
The following penalty system will be introduced on the 1st;
1. for speeding you will be kneecapped (just the one bullet to save on the expense).
2. Any further offences you will be decapitation.
Is that too strong?
May as well introduce this as the government(s) seem to want to destroy all our lives.
Con – I don’t think the Mammies have anything to do with it. Since when have modern yoof ever listened to their parents? And in my book. execution or deportation [to North Korea] are much cheaper options than internment. Don’t forget we live in difficult times…
TT – Bloody hell! All the way down to the Med? It’s a hell of a long way just to sit on a beach. And what do I get when I arrive? Too hot sun and thousands of nubile young women sunbathing topless. Mind you….. on second thoughts? 😈
JOS – Don’t forget that about 90% of our crappy nonsensical laws come from the EU. Why focus on speeding anyway? It’s not speed that’s the danger – it’s the shite drivers we have in this country. Let’s just ban all drivers with less than forty years experience.
“They couldn’t be worse than being dominated by the current self-serving, money-grubbing shitbags that seem to think that life should be regulated every second of the day”.
Ahh Grandad, who do you think there getting their orders from, the EU, we’re getting the same crap here, yeah we haven’t joined the euro (yet, and can’t wait what a revolution there’ll be then).
Start the spark Grandad, a little at a time, we’re (I’m) with you.
Book that break in Vichy France Groandad … it’ll cheer you up. You can contact the Resistance there for us. Your codename is ‘Liberace’. Sandy will be in contact with the details.
‘allo ‘allo ?
Jan M – It’s the EU I’m talking about. Our lot are just a bunch of scared arselickers dancing to the Brussels tune. It won’t save them from the wall come the revolution though!
Con – Roger. Wilco. Could I please have a different codename though? I’m not really one for flouncy dress and candelabras.
My incontrovertible predictions for 2012:-
a. There will be growth in the spring. Incest in primroses and snowdrops.
b. There will be significant events in the Middle East.
c. There will be significant events connected with the Euro. Invest in gold and rare earths.
d. The dollar will come under further pressure. Some Americans may see resort to foreign wars as a palliative.
e. Old Moore’s Almanack will predict a calamity somewhere, but get the country wrong.
f. Old Moore’s Almanack will nonetheless continue to sell like hot cakes.
g. The British royal family will have significant additions and subtractions.
h. Irish boxers will win bronze medals at the London Olympics. Pickpockets on the London underground will get a punch on the nose.
i. Katie Taylor will punch her way into Olympic glory.
j. Deaths and taxes will be inevitable. Some individual deaths will be caused by taxes.
k. President Michael D Higgins will make some quotable utterances.
l. Significant figures in the arts and literature will pass away, but most of us will turn to the sports pages rather than read their obituaries.
m. Well that’s enough about 2012. Contradict me this time next year.
ooh er, ‘Incest in primroses’ – yes, that’s pathalogically possible, but I did mean Invest.
Dogsbollix calling Liberace … Dogsbollix calling Liberace …. request for codename change denied. The turfcutters eyes are crossed… repeat … the turfcutters eyes are crossed. QRT and standing by.
Ger – You could be right with some of those. There again, you could be wrong. We can only wait and see. And I like the sound of a bit of incest between primroses and snowdrops. I will keep an eye on them and see if they get up to anything.
Con – Sandy has eaten my code book. Can I have another one please?
This furtive tryst between primroses and snowdrops could be a bio-pathological sensation; and remember, it started on Head Rambles. But I must chide you for being a two-handed predictor Grandpa. The business pages of the daily papers have too much of this On the one hand the economy could grow / On the other hand we’ll sink deeper into the mire . I will only respect an economic commentator who writes: My dear indebted readers, I honestly don’t know what’s going to happen to the euro, the price of cigs and booze, the ECB interest rate or the mortgage debt buildup. Things will get worse before they get better. A Happy Uncertain New Year to us all.
Ger – One of the little lessons I have learned from life is [and take very careful note of this wisdom] ALWAYS COVER YOUR ARSE.
I really should be charging for such wisdom.
Are you listening, Grasshopper?