Office parties
I have been following a series over on Manuel’s site at Well Done Fillet.
It has been giving me nightmares.
He has been running a wee series on the Christmas Office Party – that most horrendous of events in the business year.
It always seemed to start around July, when someone would pipe up "What are we doing about the Christmas Party this year". There would be howls of protest ["Aw,Jayzus – it’s f*cking July, for f*ck’s sake"], but the machinery would be set in motion. The fights would start. The younger crowd would want to go drinking and dancing, and the older crowd would just want to get drunk. So there would be pitched battles as to the type of venue.
Then there was the location. There were always pitched battles over that too, as staff came from all over the eastern half of the country. And everyone wanted it in their own patch.
The party itself was sheer hell. We all had only one thing in common – work. So what did we talk about? Yes. Work.
Office parties always brought out the worst in people. The bossy ones became bossier and the shy ones usually ended up in tears in the jax [toilet].
There was always some pervert who used to go around groping the secretaries behind the filing cabinets, but then I had to do something to pass the time. Didn’t I?
The one good thing about the party that I used to enjoy was going around telling everyone [especially the boss] what utter w*nk*rs they were. If they remembered the next day [which was unlikely], I would deny it and say it was someone else. I started some great post-party fights that way.
One other nice side effect was that for about four weeks after the party, no one would talk to anyone else, so we used to have peace in the office.
Ohhh Godd! The Office Party. Bad enough having to work with them but to socialise with the sycophantic f*ckers. Nooo Thanks! By the way where did you get the footage of me mate Giblets? Seen him do that too, the sick alcho!
Mobile phone cameras are great yokes!! The ruination of the Office Party, and many a person’s reputation!
That video was disgusting. But hilarious too though.
Thank god someone stopped him!
Yes. I think he had just about had enough. After all, he did have to drive home after…..
I’m going to buck the trend here and mention that I actually ENJOYED my work Christmas party last year…
Ah! So that’s you in the video?
Drive home? That was a drink before returning to Customer Helpline duties.
Having an occupation that would probably make one as popular as a member of the Garda Traffic Corps or a tax inspector at parties, I never get invited to any. I can identify very strongly with the episode of Mr Bean when he has a party!
Fortunately not, no.
Ian – You’re probably right. And why should you be unpopular? You’re welcome up to Head Rambles Manor any time whenever we break out the booze and the
hashother things.Robert – Go on. Admit it. Nothing to be ashamed of…
Christmas parties have never particularly bothered me to be honest.
I go, soak up some free food and drink.
Chat to the people I like/have something in common with/have a laugh with.
Ignore the fuckers I don’t – the brown nosed, the self centred, the egotistical, the casanova, the boring.
Go home, come in the following day and spend it arguing over who was the worst for wear and betting over who will be the last to make it in, at what time and who wont make it in at all.
Hah!! That sounds familiar 🙂
That has to be the most disgusting video clip I’ve ever seen in my short life.
By the way, I stumbled upon this website a few weeks ago and I have tuned in everyday ever since. I must admit I really enjoy your spin on events and life in general.
Thanksgiving is a much nicer holiday here than the Christmas madness: food and drink, family and friends.
Happy turkey day, Grandad, to you and your loved ones!
diane
(on a lighter note
http://tinyurl.com/295qn4 )
Joe – Welcome!! It’s a nice video, isn’t it? We take recycling seriously here…..
Daine – I’ve never experienced Thanksgiving, but it seems to lack the commercial mayhem that we get here every year.
Enjoy…!!
On America’s Thanksgiving Day, you’ve made me thankful I’m unemployed, and fit to stay that way.
Maybe I should have an office party of my own…drink down a bottle or two and tell the old collie asleep under the desk what a w*nker he is.
My husbands company has it right, they have their office Christmas party 90 minutes out of Dublin, and all sleep over. Funny thing, the one unimpressed….my youngest daughter! I am pleased I don’t have to have a smelly, snoring, pawing man in my bed! 🙂
Gawd that’s disgusting, I’m just glad I haven’t yet had my breakfast! I don’t like them either. The big wigs sit together, the office folk sit together, the warehouse staff sit together. So much for mingling. I need a good excuse not to attend mine on the 21st of December not in the least because they’re going to a Lebanese restaurant with a belly dancer! Hate vine leaves, babaganoush and men who ogle!
Oooh I have a 15 minute window to edit my own comment thats khule!
Baino,
Either you’re not in Oz or you must be posting comments very early in the morning!
looks like we’re all giving out about christmas parties today Grandad..
Grandad you are mad (In an admirable funny way off course). I fully intend to avoid all Christmas related parties this year, even family get togethers. I am sick of it.
Cheers for the mention…..it’s been updated with not what to wear…..velour out, boobies in….and covered….
Well done, delighted for you – remember me when you famous
Ian (sorry Grandad comandeering again)
I do comment about 5:30 – 6:00 am, believe me, I’m in the land downunder! Struth!