Tweeting Twitter

One of the most irritating things to appear on this Interweb is Twitter.

For the life of me, I cannot understand it.

You send text messages and are confined to 140 letters, and that includes spaces.  People then answer you when you aren’t looking and you have to try to work out what the fuck their answer means.

I mean to say, I have had erudite replies such as “Not long now, there’s always sacks full of them going by in the river beside me. It’s a pussy buffet”, or “*boom tish*”.  Now unless I have a damned good memory [which I haven’t] how the hell do I know what they are on about?

Another irritating thing about it is that I use a thing called Tweetdeck.  Now that is grand because I can bury it under a load of other programmes but the fucking thing keep popping up an irritating little thing in the corner of my screen, telling me that some prat has said something that is so fucking boring that it would make the phone book look interesting.  And if I switch it off, how am I suppose to know if someone has sent me a message?

twitternotify

And then there are the names!  God give me strength!!

Tweeting ?

Twittering  ??

Retweet  ???

Jayzus!!!

Of course everything that everyone says is intensely boring.  Do I want to know they are on the bus?  Do I want to know their coffee is growing cold?

I have two principles -

  1. If I have something to say, make it interesting.
  2. Don’t say anything.

See?  It’s simple.

And if anyone wants to watch me sating nothing, I have even added a button.

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Comments

Tweeting Twitter — 12 Comments

  1. Hahaha . . I know you Tweet you shameless Twitterer! Great way to plug your posts! I know, I know . .I do too . .Tweet not plug that is . . not much but .. the Devil makes me do it! I’m a follower!

  2. I have specifically avoided twitter. It sounds bloody stupid, so I am just not going to look.

    On another note Grandad, I know you are getting old and all that, but the site is gone very slow of late… Maybe you need a bit more porridge of a morning?

    Have you tried 10-10-20? (sprinkle lightly)
    .-= >> SAm Crea´s latest brainfart .. Its just meant to be fun you know… =-.

  3. Baino – It does have its advantages. Not many, but one or two…..

    Scribbler – Because if I didn’t have Tweetdeck, I wouldn’t be able to read anything. You can’t watch television unless you have a television set?

    Maxi – If you are looking for royalties on that, you can fuck off.

  4. in rehab here! But…it is where I found you and others grandad,who I might add are just as addicting.It’s about like starting out on booze and cigarettes,moving to pot,then onto the hard drugs(you&the rest)God help me!

  5. Tried it …. mostly because my lovely son and heir said I should (?) but I have to say it leaves me cold – not only that it also leaves me confused..

    KP rigged up a little something that showed my twitter tweets (?) in the corner of the screen but like you GD I really couldn’t keep up and for the life of me cannot understand why other people are so fascinated by it.

    I have switched it off now…

    Rant over…..

    Thank you Grandad!
    .-= >> Kate´s latest brainfart .. Green Fingers! =-.

  6. I admit, after months of (easily) ignoring Twitter, I finally gave in and got me a Twitter (and Facebook) account a couple of months ago. From there I reluctantly went whole hog, hooked up my Twitterings to Facebook and installed TweetDeck. When I moved from Windows to Ubuntu I even got TweetDeck installed there as well, spent approximately a month Twittering and…

    …and then promptly ignored Twitter altogether. Hard enough to write up blog posts these days let alone try to cram some sort of quality statement into a measly 140 characters. And I also don’t really need to know stuff like this:

    Spoiled myself with gourmet coffee this AM. Oyster flavored, yumm!

    I’m still doing Facebook though since now the whole family’s on it including M’lady (I never, ever thought she’d have anything to do with it but…). I have to face it though…I’m a virtually a social failure.

    Like your button though. Can I use it?
    .-= >> Kirk M´s latest brainfart .. Lacking posts but accomplishing more? =-.

  7. Susan – It is somewhat akin Martin King on TV3 – irritating but compulsive in an insidious sort of way.

    Sandra – Let’s just get this clear – am I great craic or great crack? I’d like to know.

    Kate – I think you’re treating this site as your personal therapist? Wait ’til you get the bill! Heh!

    Kirk M – I know damn well that you’re on Facebook. You spend your time chatting up my women. Feel free to use the button [and my women?].

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